Futures
by Chiranodoss
Summary: Hitomi returns to Gaea after three years and is quickly thrown into the non-stop action. A new adventure begins and Hitomi does not go unscathed. Life and duty get in the way of everyone's ideals and the simplest things change everything.
1. The Promise

**Well hello, I didn't see you there.**

** I suppose you've been wondering where I've been? Ah yes, well I took some time off...spontaneously, you see I didn't plan on being away. I suppose fanfiction and I drifted... see I am moderately embarrassed that I read it. I do love literature and a lot of the time fanfiction is...well awful and I didn't realize that before. However, I recently re-watched all things to do with Escaflowne (series, movie, interviews) and fell back in love, and the ending of both the series and movie are truly unsettling as an audience member, which I'm sure you all agree with otherwise you wouldn't know about this site now would you? haha oh dear. Anywho, I decided I write a story that is very true to the series and hopefully you will enjoy.**

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Three years were finally gone. That was Hitomi's promise to both Van and her parents. Seeing as she was barely a sophmore her parents really didn't agree with the idea of her dropping her education for a boy, not to mention the said boy did not want her to give up her education either. So they came to an agreement that once she was finished high school, with exceptional grades Hitomi would be allowed to make the decision of whether she would go to Gaea again or not. Now, her parents secretly hoped she would forget about him, trying to convince themselves that this 'love' she had for the boy was merely a school girl crush. It appeared that their wishes were answered when Hitomi decided to take a year of university. Unfortunately, they're hopes were crushed when Hitomi announced that as soon as she finished that year she was leaving.

"Don't you think you're being a little...impulsive?" Hitomi's mother suggested upon walking into her daughter's room with a clean basket of laundry.

Hitomi looked at her mother skeptically, "Mom, you can't do that."

"What? I wasn't doing anything!" she refuted.

Hitomi smiled warmly, "I'll be able to come back, I'm sure of it."

"When, Hitomi, you don't understand what this is like," her mother said.

"I know this is hard, I am going through it too...but I...I know this sounds naive to you, and if it was anyone else I'd be just as skeptical but... I need to see him. It's like I've been ...like I haven't been sleeping for three years and now...I'm finally able to get that peace I need." Hitomi said, trying to be as clear as she could.

"I know... it's just you're giving up so much here," her mother protested.

"I've experienced all I want to experience on Earth that I can't get in Gaea. I've finished high school, I did university-"

"One year is not experiencing university Hitomi," her mother said.

"It's all I want," Hitomi said.

Her mother just stared at her with an unreadable expression.

"I love him...and... I'm sorry," Hitomi said honestly.

The hardest part about it was that in some strange way Mrs. Kanzaki understood everything her daughter was saying and wanted to give it to her, the only thing stopping her from giving her daughter what she wanted was her own selfishness.

"Have you told your Grandma?"

Hitomi shook her head, "no, I was going to call her in a bit. I figure she'll know how to get there."

Her mother nodded silently,"this is what you want then."

Hitomi nodded, noting her mother's pain she quickly stopped her from leaving, "Mom, can you talk to me about this? Tell me what you're feeling."

She was hesitant at first, feeling as if it would have no impact on her daughter's decision, but decided to be honest with her," Hitomi, I'm afraid. I want you to be happy but I don't want to be unhappy without you as the expense. I know it's selfish of me but that is a mother's lot in life. Not to mention, I want to see you married, I want to see my grandchildren...and this sort of limits that."

"I understand. I can't not do this but I will be able to see you, I can grant you that small mercy. I'll come here to deliver my children...I'll even have a second ceremony here. There will be visits, I promise. Mumma, I need you just as much as I need him."

No matter what either of them said, it wouldn't be what the other wanted. No matter what compromise they came to, it wouldn't be a compromise at all, one would always lose.

After speaking to her grandmother Hitomi had a fairly good idea of how she was going to get back. While she had no direct connection to Gaea, she was able to share the same thought and feeling with one person in particular. She'd done it before, to come back to Earth and there was no question of her telekinetic abilities, regardless of how long it had been since she used them.

She'd decided to do it right where it first happened; the track course. All of her close friends and family were there to see her off, Yukari, her parents, her brother and Amano. There didn't seem to be any need for anyone else to be there.

"It's not goodbye, it's definitely a 'see you soon', I love you all too much to be away from you...even you," Hitomi said indicating her younger brother.

The humor wasn't really necessary and it seemed almost out of place but some part of everyone appreciated the attempt of making the situation lighter. Her mother stood there, afraid to make any sort of movement with her face for fear that she wouldn't be able to stop crying. While her father and brother both held it together quite well, and appeared their best to be relaxed. Whereas Yukari seemed to be taking every opportunity to stop herself from moving, while Amano tried to aid her attempts. As each person embraced her, both Yukari and Hitomi dreaded to second that they would have to face each other.

It was inevitable though. As Hitomi walked over to her best friend she could feel the desperation in the air. They both felt they were doing a good job of keeping it together and even as they went to hug each other they succeeded in being composed but as they began to pull away from each other a sudden force stopped them from moving. With a jolt, Yukari tightened her arms around Hitomi's neck and let out a loud sob, a war front of tears poured down her face as she tried to stop herself from becoming hysterical. Hitomi, in turn, had thrown away her vanity and cried loudly in broken heaves, neither could breathe and for a moment they were the only lifeline the other had in the whole world.

"Parting is such sweet sorrow..." Hitomi tried to joke again but Yukari only cried harder and tried not to let go.

"I love you so much Tomi," Yukari choked out.

Hitomi nodded quickly into her best friend's shoulder, "I know, I love you too."

Finally the two friends parted, while they allowed their hands to remain linked.

The fact that she wasn't having this reaction with her family startled her for a second and she wondered if there was something wrong with the situation, however the thought quickly left her mind. There was nothing she could do about it, she hadn't planned on being this emotional especially with her friend but she was and there was nothing she could do to change that. She hadn't been able to have the conversation she had with her mother, with Yukari, there had never been time and this was the only way they're goodbye could happen.

Hitomi walked to the middle of the track field and looked up then back at the loves of her Earthly life.

"Everybody smile!" she choked taking out her camera.

For some reason everybody was able to laugh through their tears to make a truly bittersweet moment.

Then Hitomi focused her thoughts and channeled all her energy into Van's thoughts and being back on Gaea with him and everyone else. She pictured the sky and the two moons, the lush open fields that reminded her so much of Van, which called back his scent; that one thing that overwhelmed her senses and allowed her to relive every detail of that beloved planet. She knew it was working because just as she forgot about what she was doing, she felt her body envelope in warmth. The pillar was upon her and her body was lifted into the air.

In almost no time at all she was traveling through the border between planets, the light was carrying her home.

The landing was right where she expected to be dropped off, Arzas; the village just outside of the Fanelian city capitol. It seemed to be just a bit later than it was on earth; the sun was setting and the two moons were waxing into view. No one was out but she could see that the city was finally beginning to really resemble its old architecture again. While there weren't as many buildings yet, it was cleaned up and there was construction undergoing everywhere, it even looked to be expanding. That was the thing, Van attracted people to him, whether he wanted them or not, he was like a magnet; he was everyone's polar opposite that he couldn't help but draw them in. He'd attracted her and she hadn't been able to forget about him, she could only imagine that applied to the Fanelian citizens as well.

Suddenly a surge of excitement intercepted her nostalgia and she couldn't move fast enough. Her heart raced inside her chest, the idea of having wings crossed her mind, which only made her want to see him more. Her stumbles and trips didn't phase her, she continued to press on with the same vigor she had started with. The tall grass irritated her bare legs while rocks and other debris crept into her sandals, her coordination and balance was flying all over the place and all she could do to express her overwhelming excitement was laugh. Her smile radiated from her face all the way down to her toes, she hadn't been this excited since she was a child. As a teenager she hadn't experienced such a pure, unadulterated emotion of happiness, it was usually clouded with some small worry or fear. Not this time however, it was like her whole body was singing and crying out to be near him. She could feel him again; the same way she felt him when she first realized it was Van she was in love with, not Allen.

She had fantasized about this moment for three years, however every scenario she had conjured up had slipped from her mind in the most perfect of outcomes. She loved the fact that she would have a completely spontaneous reunion with him.

Finally she reached the entrance of the city. For a second she stopped trying to savor the moment of joy and anticipation that tingled in every corner of her body. The smile hadn't left her face as she walked through the city walls, she relished every second of it. People were out doing evening activities but it appeared relatively quiet. However, for a developing city it was not too shabby. She continued to walk down the main road that lead directly to the castle, which appeared the only completely finished piece of architecture. The wide street was lined with buildings of all sorts of designs, that was one thing she remembered in the short time that she'd been in Fanelia, the details in the architecture were similar to that of ancient Roman or Greek design but at the same time were a completely new concept.

As she neared the castle she began to hear the faint sound of music. She'd never heard Fanelian music before aside from the fan fair Van received at his coronation ceremony; all the rest had been Asturian. Just when it seemed she couldn't exceed her excitement any further it seemed to reach a new level. The music gradually got louder and some part of her began to run again, she couldn't stop her body from acting on its own. The motion of slowing down felt so wrong and foreign that all she could do was speed up. She hadn't realized that she began to take a detour from the direct route of the castle and instead followed the music. Once she arrived at the source of the music she realized that some sort of party or festival was happening.

Street vendors were set up along the opening and lanterns were draped from rooftop to roof top. The warm glow of the colored lanterns made for a comfortable atmosphere with a decorative flare. As she passed by a vacant vendor he made a quick effort to get her attention.

"I see you looking at my stones miss, I could fashion you a lovely necklace," he offered.

Hitomi smiled, kindly rejecting his offer and thought to herself how much he reminded her of Moleman.

"What is it about merchants here, they're so creepy," she mumbled jovially.

There was clearing where quite a few people were dancing, it reminded her of a wedding. As soon as the thought entered her head she felt a sudden pang of panic, quickly she turned to the first person she saw.

"Is this a wedding?" Hitomi asked.

As soon as the woman got over her initial fright she answered Hitomi, "no dear, have you never been to Fanelia before?"

With that the woman walked away leaving Hitomi with her relief and confusion. If it wasn't a wedding, what was going on?

Hitomi made her way through the crowd to see if she could find anyone she recognized. She noticed people staring at her odd clothes and remembered when Millerna had made the mistake of assuming she was a hand maid.

Right in the middle of her memory she noticed a flash of long blonde hair in the dim lighting. Quickly, she made her way through the crowd to catch the blonde. Unfortunately this blonde was moving too fast for her to keep up with, _where the hell are they going in such a hurry!_ It wasn't long before she had lost sight of them. Feeling a little disheartened she stopped her pursuit and made her way to a little clearing out of the way of the dancers.

'Okay, what do I do?" Hitomi mused, seeing as she didn't really know what was going on. Then she spotted the blonde again, this time in a better spot and she was able to get a good look at who they were. She was about to call over then her attention, as well as the rest of the people's was drawn to a speaker in the opposite direction.

"Thank you all for attending the celebration of our fabulous King's birth!" the girl exclaimed.

After further review Hitomi came to the conclusion that it was Merle, with that she figured Van couldn't be far, however she was disappointed when she saw him no where.

"I don't get it, where's Van?" Hitomi questioned outloud.

"He never stays for the speech," someone beside her said.

"Why?" Hitomi asked, she knew he was shy but she didn't expect him to run for the hills because of a speech.

"I guess he doesn't like to acknowledge he's getting older," they joked.

Hitomi gave them a skeptical look, "you're kidding."

"I have no idea why he doesn't stay, because he loves to mingle with his people... maybe he gets too tired." they suggested.

Clearly this person was rather useless.

As Merle continued to speak Hitomi migrated her way over to the blonde.

"Allen," she whispered coming up behind him.

Allen did a quick turn and his eyes almost burst out of their sockets.

"Hitomi!" he exclaimed a little too loudly and received a harsh scolding from the spectators.

Allen gave a sheepish expression of apology then turned back to Hitomi and embraced her warmly.

"I came back to be with you Allen, I want to take you up on your marriage proposal," Hitomi said seriously.

Allen was silent for a second and his warm, relaxed stature suddenly tensed, "uh..."

It was the first time Hitomi had seen him at a loss for words, his knightly eloquence was gone for a brief moment.

"Well... Hitomi...ohhh..." he stammered.

Hitomi allowed him to feel awkward for a few more minutes before cracking a large smile, "I'm just kidding! How are you!"

Suddenly Allen's posture slackened and he smiled back, "I was worried for a moment there. I can't believe you're here! What a day to come back-how long will you be here?"

Hitomi smiled at his enthusiasm, "for however long I'm welcome."

"Van will be so pleased," Allen smiled.

"Why does he leave?" Hitomi asked.

"I think it has to do with his humility, he doesn't feel he needs to be praised," Allen said.

Hitomi smiled more, "this is Van we're talking about, you might be confusing him with yourself."

Allen smiled, "you're too hard on him Hitomi."

"Is anyone else here?" she asked.

Allen nodded, "everyone is."

"Can I see them!" Hitomi squeaked, her excitement climbing again.

"As you wish," Allen said, "but I think we should wait for Merle to finish."

"Right," Hitomi said.

"Allen!" someone called.

Hitomi turned to see who the voice was coming from and had to stop herself from barreling the woman over.

"Millerna!" Hitomi called back.

"Hit-Hitomi? _Hitomi!_" the woman called back and ran, to the best of her ability to Hitomi and hugged her.

"Millerna...it's good to see you," Hitomi smiled after pulling away.

"You too my friend," Millerna beamed.

"I was about to ask how you are but I guess I can see that," Hitomi said looking down at Millerna.

Millerna laughed, "pregnant, yes. Dryden decided to come back... and I was waiting, bet you couldn't have predicted that one hmm?"

Hitomi hadn't realized how good humored Millerna was, or maybe they both grew up enough in three years.

"Is Dryden here?" Hitomi asked.

"Oh yes, he's probably discussing trade with other merchants... I guess I can't cater to that part of his brain," Millerna joked.

Hitomi smiled and drank in the moment of having both Millerna and Allen back in her life, "I really did miss you both."

They both gave her genuine smiles back.

"So have we," Allen said.

"Have you seen Van?" Millerna asked suddenly.

Hitomi shook her head.

"Oh he'll be thrilled, what a great gift, did you know it was his birthday?" Millerna asked.

Hitomi shook her head, "we never talked about things like that."

"No, I suppose you wouldn't have been able to," Millerna mused.

"Now, why would the King leave a perfectly good party?" Dryden asked walking into the group, not noticing Hitomi right away.

"Hi Dryden," Hitomi greeted.

"Well if it isn't Hitomi! What brings you to our little planet?" Dryden asked cooly.

Millerna jabbed him in the side.

"Ah right, Van might have had something to do with it," he said.

Hitomi laughed.

"Hitomi!" came Merle's shrill cry.

Hitomi attempted to turn to face the cat girl but there was no use, Merle had almost attacked her.

"Hey Merle, it's good to see you too," Hitomi grunted under the cat girl's weight.

"Oh Hitomi! We missed you! Lord Van will be so happy!" she squeaked.

In the three years they were apart Merle had done a lot of physical growing but remained the same girl Hitomi met three years prior.

"We have to get you to the castle now!" Merle exclaimed climbing off Hitomi.

"You'd think she'd have a little more decorum now, wouldn't you? But nope," Dryden said.

Hitomi laughed but Merle wasn't so amused.

"You mean we can just leave?" Hitomi asked.

"Well yeah, that's what servants are for," Merle said.

Hitomi's eyes widened at the complete lack of concern for them, "you can't really be that blase about them."

Merle shook her head, 'no, but it is their job, I think they'll forgive me for that comment."

Hitomi shrugged, Merle was right but it still seemed a little insensitive.

When they all reached the castle the halls were dark except for the random torches on the walls.

"Kind of colonial don't you think," Hitomi said.

"What?" Merle asked.

"I mean, the lighting...really?" Hitomi asked.

"Oh, we have other methods, but when it's late we just use the minimum required to see," Merle said.

Hitomi didn't argue, although it did seem a little odd.

"Will he be asleep?" Hitomi asked.

"Probably not, he's probably on the roof... training," Merle said.

"For what?" Hitomi asked.

Merle shook her head.

"It's normal for a man to continue to practice, it's not something that's easy to stop doing," Allen answered.

"Oh," Hitomi said.

Just as they reached the stairs to get to the roof Hitomi turned to face them all.

"Would it be alright if I went up alone?" Hitomi asked, "I just...I want to see him alone. Would that be alright?"

No one objected to her request, in fact they allowed her to go willingly, even Merle.

So Hitomi began her ascent up the stairs to the one person she'd been dying to see.

Step after step and it didn't seem like she was getting anywhere closer to the top, it was like an endless spiral of stairs. Her legs were growing tired when she finally felt the end approaching she heard something at the top of the staircase. She was able to summon up enough energy to race to the top where she saw his silhouette in the moonlight.

"Who's there?" he asked.

Hitomi couldn't help but smile, she had been waiting so long just to hear his voice. It didn't even matter that what he said wasn't something she'd conjured up in her fantasies, it was real and that was all she needed.

At her lack of response and continued movement, she saw him draw his sword, "identify yourself.'

"Van..." she breathed.

She noticed him falter and let his guard down slightly, even though she couldn't see his face she could tell he was struggling to believe his ears.

"Van, it's me," she smiled, "you don't need your sword."

She walked out of the darkness allowing him to see her face.

"Hit...Hitomi..." he breathed, taking a step down toward her.

She nodded and walked up to meet him, "it's been a while Van..."

They stood there drinking in the sight of each other, where each had changed and where they were still able to see the familiar person they fell in love with.

"Hitomi I... I... how long?" he asked.

At some point their hands hand found each other and were subconsciously locked together.

"I just got here and as for how long... well I'm hoping as long as you'll have me," she smiled.

Both were afraid to give themselves over completely, and were very apprehensive in every move they made. Each action motivated by love but guided by fear.

"I'd be happy to have you stay with me," he said.

They'd returned to their fifteen year old selves again, both able to be children for a second time, for Van, his first.

Then, like breathing, they were able to sense each other's feelings, and they closed the gap between their bodies. While both wanted more, this embrace was perfect for the moment; everything was said in this simple action. All the longing and love they had for the other was communicated.

Hitomi wove her arms tightly around his neck and pressed her body against him, as if trying to imprint him onto her skin, "I missed you so much." Tears began to fall where she had not planned, she did not expect to be so overwhelmed but she couldn't stop them.

He remained quiet and tightened his grip around her waist, "I missed you."

"I'm sorry it took me so long," she said.

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** You're still here? My goodness you are a trooper aren't you**? **Well thank you for reading and you know what, it sure would be super if you could review because it gets a little discouraging when no one gives you feedback. No one' s forcing you but you know that you like reviews so why not take part in a little reciprocity eh? **

Enjoy the rest of your day.


	2. Arise

**Hi there, hope I didn't scare you away. Hope my writing did please some of you, and I'm sure it irritated some of you when there was no kiss. Guess you'll have to keep reading. Here is our second installment!**

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Hitomi woke up to a hard smack.

"Wake up Hitomi!" Merle exclaimed beating Hitomi with a pillow.

"Christ almighty! Merle just what are you trying to do!" Hitomi yelled as she sat up holding her nose.

"Who said anything about trying, I succeeded didn't I? You're awake aren't you?" Merle said.

"Haven't you heard the expression, _you'll get more flies with honey than vinegar_?" Hitomi yelled.

"No, anyway, get up!" Merle ordered pulling off her blanket.

"Hey! What are you doing!" Hitomi cried grabbing at the sheets.

"Do we really have to do this again?" Merle asked uninterested.

Hitomi just grumbled and got out of bed.

"I don't know how you sleep in so late, you waste the day," Merle said sitting on Hitomi's bed.

"Well excuse me, Miss Kitty Cat," Hitomi responded.

"You really have to work on those comebacks you know," Merle stated.

Hitomi said nothing, not wanting to further the conversation.

"A bath is ready in there," Merle indicated to a door across from the bed.

"Oh...thank you," Hitomi said.

"Don't thank me, I didn't do it," Merle said, "now hurry up! You've wasted half the day!"

Hitomi did as she was told and got ready as quickly as she could.

* * *

"Do you think it was a good thing she came back now then?" Allen asked Van.

"A part of me says yes, and a part that says no. It's difficult to call right now Allen," Van said.

"You remember what happened last time," Allen said.

"Yes, Allen, I remember, do you?" Van asked, his patience waning, Allen still had an edge of superiority when it came to Van.

"Calm down Van, I'm just trying to remind you of how Hitomi reacted to-"Allen started.

"How I reacted to what?" Hitomi said walking in on their conversation.

Allen was silent.

"To the last war, " Van answered.

"There's a war happening right now? So much for that talk of keeping up skill Allen, " Hitomi attacked.

Van threw a confused glance back at Allen, then looked at Hitomi, "no, not exactly."

"What does that mean?" Hitomi asked.

"I knew she wouldn't react well to this, come Hitomi, this is no conversation for a lady," Allen said putting his arm around her, guiding her to the exit.

"No Allen, I want to hear this, you can't just censor yourself when I'm around. I'm here, let me know what's happening."

Van simply waited for Allen to either stay and listen or leave, he expected the former.

"As you wish," Allen said and resumed a spot next to Hitomi.

"Van, what's going on?"

"I'm a Draconian, you know that. There is maybe a handful of us left on Gaea," Van said.

"Okay... I'm not really following," Hitomi said looking to Allen for some kind of clarification.

"There have been winged people popping up all over Gaea, who aren't Draconian," Van continued.

"What do you mean, like angels?" Hitomi asked.

"No, as in genetically modified humans," Van clarified.

"So wait, how do you know they aren't Draconian?" Hitomi asked.

"No Draconian would openly expose that," Van said.

"What's the problem, I'm sorry but I don't see it," Hitomi said.

"People are constructing new people, a superior race you could call it. Unlike the people of Atlantis, these people didn't naturally develop, someone is modifying them. However, it isn't working the way they want it to, these people end up dying as a terrible reaction to the gene manipulation but they are trying to make an army of these...'_Angels'_," Allen explained.

"At some point they will find out about me, and when they do, they will do all that is in their power to replicate my genetic data," Van said, "once they have that information it won't be long before they will be able to recreate Draconians; repeating the history of Atlantis."

Hitomi was silent as she tried to process what he just told her, "so...what would happen to you, Van?"

"I'll die," he answered quietly.

Hitomi closed her eyes wishing she could unhear those words, "what are you going to do? How can I help?"

"We're flying out to Pallas tonight, until then I wouldn't worry just yet," Van said.

"Don't worry? Van, I can't do that!" Hitomi yelled.

"Hitomi calm down," Van said.

There it was, his first slap since her arrival and she hadn't even been back a full day.

"Don't tell me to calm down, Van Fanel," she ordered through tears.

Van and Allen simply stood there as Hitomi exited the room.

Alllen allowed a few minutes of silence to pass before he spoke, "well...that went well."

* * *

"Oh Hitomi, we've been through worse, he'll be able to survive this one," Millerna tried.

"I just don't get how I didn't see this coming, how I didn't have a vision or some intuition that something was wrong!" Hitomi sobbed.

"Hitomi stop, you can't let your worst fears happen. Isn't that what you learned the last time? All this fear and anxiety won't help him, you need to believe in him, that he'll be alright," Millerna said.

Hitomi stopped and sniffed, "Millerna...it's like you're a different person!"

"Just what do you mean by that?" Millerna asked.

"I just...didn't expect you to be so..."

"Yes?"

"Wise," Hitomi stated.

"...Thank you Hitomi," Millerna said flatly.

"I didn't mean it like that," Hitomi protested.

"You know, you should really think about what you say before you say it sometimes," Millerna told her.

Hitomi was quiet, "I guess... you know, I slapped him."

"Who?" Millerna was interested again.

"Van."

"_No!_ I could never slap Dryden...well, that's a lie I probably could..." Millerna mused, " you know what would make you feel better right now?"

"No..."Hitomi answered.

"Chocolate," Millerna exclaimed.

"You have that here?" Hitomi asked.

"If we didn't how do you think pregnant women would survive? Let alone their husbands," Millerna said trying to get up .

"Here Millerna, let me help you," Hitomi laughed at her friend's failed attempt.

"Oh you laugh now, wait until you're carrying Van's child," Millerna griped.

Hitomi couldn't help but feel slightly awkward at the comment, she dreamed about being close enough to him that it would result in a child bt hearing someone else say it made her feel all the more introverted.

"Hitomi? Are you coming?" Millerna called.

"Oh yes, sorry, coming!" Hitomi called racing after Millerna.

* * *

"Is that all you're taking?" Millerna asked as Hitomi took her same duffel bag from her room.

"It's all I need," Hitomi said.

"Not in my court... we'll do something about that when we get to Pallas though," Millerna said.

"Are you trying to pick a fight?" Hitomi asked.

Millerna smiled, "it'll be like when I first met you."

There was a small sadness in the memory, which Hitomi couldn't quite understand.

As they reached the boarding station of the Crusade, a smile came to Hitomi's face, which didn't go unnoticed by Millerna.

"What are you smiling at Hitomi?" Millerna asked before she started smiling.

"What are _you_ smiling at?" Hitomi asked.

"I haven't said your name in such a long time," Millerna said.

Hitomi softened her smile, "I just remember the last time I was on this ship, and we went to Pallas..."

"I really did miss you Hitomi," Millerna said.

"I did too," Hitomi said.

"There you are," Dryden said walking over to Millerna, "are you ready?"

Millerna nodded.

"Are you coming with us Hitomi? Or are you going with the King?" Dryden asked.

"Van's not going with you?" Hitomi asked, confused.

"He's the only one who can pilot Escaflowne," Dryden said.

"He's taking Escaflowne? We're already there?" Hitomi asked.

"It's just a precaution, it's easier to have it now then be without it," Dryden explained.

"No, no, _no_! Things aren't supposed to move this quickly!" Hitomi panicked.

"Hitomi, remember what I said. If this is bothering you, go with him!" Millerna ordered.

Hitomi looked at her and Dryden, "right."

"He's out back getting the armor," Dryden offered.

"Thank you Dryden," Hitomi said and wandered to the back of the castle.

The last time she had been to the monument she'd said her final goodbye to Van. She'd cried for three days straight after, she wasn't able to do anything except stare at the sky. Any conversation she had she prayed she would be able to connect it back to Van or Gaea.

There he was, the same boy she'd fallen in love with, three years later. Time had done nothing to him, he remained the same beautiful soul with rough edges. The more she thought about him the more she found it hard to separate herself from him. While he still retained his boyish endearment, he had taken subtle maturity to his features. He'd always been beautiful but now what he possessed was deeper than any beauty she'd ever seen. Hitomi had become so overwhelmed with her love for him that she was able to forget about everything else he caused her. She'd finally reached the end of missing him and yet at the present moment she couldn't help but miss him.

Something propelled her to move towards him, to run to him like her life depended on his contact. He still hadn't taken notice of her as he stared up at the grave site of his family. Then like a tonne of bricks she had her arms around him; her body conformed to the shape of his back as her arms gripped around his torso, underneath his arms. She could feel his body tense in surprise and gently relax as he realized it was her.

"I'm sorry..." she breathed into his back.

There wasn't anything Van was supposed to say, she didn't need him to say anything she just needed to know he heard her. Hitomi just breathed him in and everything that was his essence; the fields, forests and air of Fanelia. The feeling of him moving his arms to match hers only made her hold onto him tighter.

"I'm coming with you," she said.

She felt him nod as he opened her arms and walked toward Escaflowne. Hitomi just watched as he walked away from her and decided that out of everything that she had been through with him and without him, the worst was seeing him walk away from her. It gave her a sense of helplessness that she had never felt with anyone else.

She watched as he took his energist and drew his own blood, it really was a rather grotesque way of operating the thing but there wasn't a whole lot she could do about it. The reaction was the same as it had been the first time he had activated the machine, the glowing jewel, the loud crack as the pilot chamber opened. Everything brought her back to her very first day in Gaea.

The transformation happened quickly; one minute it was a suit of armor the next it was the white dragon.

"Come on Hitomi, " Van called to her, removing her from her thoughts.

* * *

**hey, there's the next chap. Show me some love and review?**


	3. Kings and Queens

**Look how fantastic I am! Updating, and in such a short amount of time. **

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"Bet you weren't expecting things to move this quickly eh?" Merle joked.

Hitomi just shrugged, "I guess I'm used to it."

"Hitomi stop moving!" Millerna ordered.

"Are you sure you should be doing this Millerna, you are pregnant after all," Hitomi said.

Millerna stood up properly and faced Hitomi with her hands on her hips, "exactly, I'm _pregnant_ not disabled."

"Now you're just splitting hairs," Merle mumbled.

"What was that Merle?" Millerna snapped.

"Nothing!" Merle jumped.

"Really Millerna I don't need a new dress," Hitomi protested.

"I want you to have one, you should be adorned in the most fabulous clothing!Since we weren't able to do anything last night, we're doing it tonight! You want Van to go wild don't you?" Millerna asked.

"Yeah she does," Merle answered.

"Bad kitty," Hitomi scolded.

Merle just stuck out her tongue and wagged her tail.

"Hitomi, if you don't stop moving I will stab you," Millerna stated.

Hitomi's eyes widened as Millerna went back to the gown in process.

"Millerna really! Haven't you got something that will suffice?" Hitomi whined.

"Are you going to continue to do this?" Millerna asked, irritated.

"Only until I'm off the hook," Hitomi said.

"Fine! I give up! I'll see what I have," Millerna grumbled.

"Thank you, I do appreciate it," Hitomi called after her.

"Yeah yeah..." Millerna replied as she went through her closet.

"You should know better than to upset a pregnant woman Hitomi," Merle chided.

"Dumb cat!"

"I don't think Lord Van would like to hear you talking to me like that," Merle teased.

* * *

The Asturian banquet hall had filled with people almost immediately. All wearing a form of formal wear that Hitomi had never seen before.

"Are all these people from Asturia?" Hitomi asked leanign over to Millerna.

"Most are, but there are people from other countries here too. Asturia is very popular," Millerna said proudly.

Hitomi started laughing, "okay Millerna, whatever you say."

"Oh wow, look at all these people!" Millerna squealed.

"I know..." Hitomi gaped.

"Hitomi's only looking at one in particular," Merle smirked.

Hitomi glared at Merle.

"He does look very handsome Hitomi," Millerna said.

Hitomi smiled shyly.

"Go dance with him," Millerna encouraged.

Hitomi shook her head, "I have no idea how you people dance."

"Let him lead you," Millerna said.

"It's not that easy," Hitomi protested.

"It's that easy," Merle stated, "here have a glass of this... think of it as liquid confidence."

"We have alcohol on Earth too Merle," Hitomi said, "trust me we were able to pick up on that one."

"So then, what's stopping you?" Merle asked.

"I-" Hitomi started but their conversation was interrupted when Allen entered.

"Good evening ladies, and how are you both?" he asked courteously.

"Fantastic," Merle supplied.

"Hitomi, would you dance with me?" he asked.

"Well I uh, Allen I don't know how," she said.

"Let me lead you then," he said.

"Told ya," Merle said.

"Thank you Merle," Hitomi stated, "well...I guess I can't see why not?"

Allen offered her his hand and quickly swept her to the middle of the dance floor. While Van sat watching as his rival and best friend entertained the love of his life.

"You know, you could always ask her," Gaddes suggested.

Van didn't say anything, just continued to glare at the two sweep across the floor.

"Hey, don't drink too much of that, it doesn't hit you immediately but when it hits you...you're gone," Gaddes warned him.

"Thank you Gaddes," Van placated.

Gaddes shrugged and walked turned to Dryden on his right.

Van could feel the jealousy boiling in his veins as he watched them finish the dance.

"Hey, why's the boss dancing with Hitomi?" Reiden asked Gaddes as he walked over.

"I don't know, maybe you should ask Van," Gaddes teased.

"You know, you could stay there and be angry at us _or _you could go over and ask her to dance,"Dryden suggested.

Van didn't want them to know that they were right, however now was not the time for posturing.

"Thank you," Van said curtly before leaving them.

"He's still got way too much pride," Dryden mused.

Van watched as Hitomi and Allen made their way over to the side of the room to continue their conversation. He could feel his insecurities growing but he refused to give into them and pressed on until he reached her.

Just as he was about to say something, she noticed him.

"Van," Hitomi beamed.

He suddenly felt stupid, he knew he would look pathetic in front of Allen and couldn't stand to be under his scrutiny. Luckily his fears were terminated when Hitomi asked him to dance. He accepted quickly, taking a glance at Allen before he offered his arm to Hitomi. As they moved away he could feel Allen's stare burning his back, even though they both knew who Hitomi belonged to.

"I don't really know what I'm doing," Van confessed, carefully placing his hand on the small of her back.

Hitomi smiled, "neither do I."

Van smiled, "we can fight a war but we can't seem to master dancing."

"Clearly our lives are filled with more...important things than dancing," Hitomi suggested.

"No... not really..." Van laughed.

They'd started dancing anyway, luckily it was fairly slow and a Gaean standard rather than a native Asturian dance.

"Being a King isn't more important?" Hitomi asked.

"Social etiquette is part of the job," he said.

"So you just skipped out on those practices?"

"You could say that," he said.

As they turned Hitomi was able to get a glimpse of Allen and started laughing.

"What is it?" Van asked.

"Allen..." Hitomi smiled.

As the dance finished the two of them made their way outside, a few other couples had spilled out into the gardens; the heat of the ballroom being too much or simply wanting to get a moment alone.

Neither of them were very formal, at least when in each other's company. They're familiarity with each other allowed them to be whatever they needed without putting on any formalities or facades. They walked down the large stone steps that lead to the fountains, they noticed another couple not too far away completely engrossed in each other.

Taking a seat on one of the steps Hitomi smiled, wishing that she were in the same situation.

Van didn't follow her lead, instead he leaned against one of the railings that lined the wide steps.

Neither of them said anything, not feeling any need to poison the silence with dialogue; simply being in the other's company felt like enough.

Finally Hitomi spoke, cutting the silence easily, "when I was home... I thought about this place a lot; about Gaea: about Fanelia, Pallas... even Zaibach. I don't think there's anywhere on earth like them. I mean we developed differently, no one on earth would be able to create a fate altering machine let alone a guymelef... and at the same time no one on Gaea feels the need to explore space or create vending machines."

"Vending machines?" Van asked.

"They dispense packaged food, which is another thing that Gaea hasn't done... The technology's just different..." Hitomi said, "they're so different."

Van suddenly felt guilty for having met her, if it hadn't been for him she wouldn't have had to make the decision of giving up her family and life on the Mystic Moon.

"I know what you're thinking Van... and don't," she said.

Van jumped a little at her statement, he knew she had methods of reading people but he didn't know it went as far as telepathic abilities.

"Don't feel guilty, you've probably been the best thing that's ever happened to me. I think that...that I needed you and I didn't even know it myself; like you were sent to me in a way," Hitomi told him.

"Do you miss them?" he asked.

She nodded and smiled, "not like I missed you though. I didn't know what to do with myself after I got back to Earth and I didn't understand why then. All I'd wanted was to go home afterall, but as soon as I got back I needed to be in Gaea. I don't feel that way about Earth and I think that's because I know that I need to be here."

She didn't need to tell him how much her heart and body longed for him in those three years, she didn't need to tell him that her very essence was him; he knew. Her heart had been his for so long now that it almost didn't seem necessary to say it. That day in Zaibach had been her grand epiphany, meanwhile he'd been completely conscious of his love for her and she'd completely missed it.

That was another thing she admired about him, a quality that she, herself, did not possess; an impenetrable certainty of anything. His faith in people and his sureness of things was something she could never quite grasp. Afterall, she'd convinced herself she was in love with Amano then as soon as she set eyes on Allen she thought she was in love with him; she constantly fell victim to silly aesthetics. The fact that Van was like neither of them surprised her but the very utterance of the thought, the final acknowledgment of saying she loved Van had been the clearest her mind ad ever been. She was impenetrably certain.

"How have you been Van?" Hitomi asked, suddenly realizing she hadn't asked him anything since she'd been in Gaea.

He looked at her a little surprised, which made her feel worse, _God even he picked up on the fact that I was paying no attention to him_.

"It's been pretty non-stop, as soon as you left we started to rebuild. That's been out primary concern, getting Fanelia back up to what it was. My father set a pretty big standard to live up to," Van said.

It was a generic response for the most part, he had a very hard time talking about his past, even with Hitomi. She knew all the facts and got a general sense of pain from the memories, but she'd never heard him first hand talk about how he felt towards his parents.

"How old were you when you're father died Van," she asked.

"Six," he answered easily.

"You never got the chance to know him..." Hitomi mused, getting up and walking over to where he was leaning.

Van stayed silent.

"You can talk to me about these things Van," Hitomi assured him.

He nodded, "I know."

"You don't have to force them out of your mind just because they bring you pain," she said, "sometimes confronting them makes everything else a little easier."

"Would it be alright if we didn't talk about them? Now at least?" Van asked.

Hitomi smiled, "yeah."

"Do you want to go inside? It's getting a little cold," he offered.

Hitomi nodded and laced her fingers with his as they walked back to the ballroom.

* * *

It was because he wasn't in his own palace, he reasoned with himself.

The only reason he'd been wandering aimlessly for almost twenty minutes was because he wasn't used to his surroundings. If he were back in Fanelia this wouldn't be a problem; he would have found his rooms without any problems.

He'd never realized how different Millerna's home was to his own; the architecture really needed some work. The fact that the floors were so uneven was a problem, he was falling all over the place; he would have to mention it to Dryden in the morning.

It had definitely been a party like no other, granted he had never really been to one anywhere other than in Fanelia. The thought occurred to him that he was somewhat of an introvert.

"I need more friends," he mumbled, the sound of his own voice alarming him.

It was the first time in a while that he'd been able to actually enjoy himself as a guest. That was all thanks to Hitomi's presence. As much as he didn't want to admit it, he pined for her everyday she was gone.

It was also the first time where he didn't have to socialize with his own council about the Fanelian government. He'd been allowed to sit back and do absolutely nothing.

He let out a small chuckle and stumbled forward, barely catching himself on the wall. A small snort came out as he adjusted himself and stumbled forward again with his hand stretched out using the wall for support.

He'd never seen that many people in one place before. He hadn't realized how popular Asturia was, let alone Hitomi. He remembered what Hitomi was wearing and started to smile again but just as the thought entered his head he quickly looked around to see if anyone was awake. The idea was not okay to be going on in a King's mind. The sudden action caused him to stop, it was definitely not a good idea to move that quickly. He fell ungracefully against the wall while he waited for his mind to readjust.

He'd definitely never felt like this before. What had happened? Where was everyone else? Why was he alone?

Immediately his thoughts reverted to Allen.

"Allen..." Van grumbled.

He remembered the way Allen wanted Hitomi and that stupid kiss they had. Allen always had that against Van, he'd had the balls where Van didn't. Van grunted; _perfect_ Allen. He remembered vaguely that Hitomi had left early while Allen tried to convince her to stay or amybe offered to escort her back to her room, that was probably when Van resorted to drinking. Although he didn't think he'd had that much alcohol.

He then remembered Gaddes saying something about the alcohol, but that had been ages ago.

The thought of Hitomi rejecting Allen still remained a rather triumphant memory of Van's. All of Allen's eloquence and chivalry had failed, albeit Van really didn't know why but the fact remained that she had chosen him over Allen.

However even in his victorious memory he felt a little downtrodden. He couldn't quite put a finger on it but he knew it had something to do with Hitomi.

Damn it, where the hell was his room? He didn't have any particular idea of where he was going but he figured his room had to be somewhere. Finally he saw the door, releasing a contented sigh, he stumbled over to it. It took about three tries for him to get any sort of grasp on the doorknob, which he then transferred all his weight into, allowing the door to swing open.

Light quickly flooded his vision causing him to wince with the sudden contrast from dark to light.

"What the fu-" he grumbled, swaying with the door.

"Van?" came Hitomi's voice.

"Hitomi?"

"Van are you...drunk?" Hitomi started to giggle.

"Hitomi?"

She was still in the dress he assumed Millerna had given her; a long royal blue Grecian gown. The fabric hung and gathered around her hips and breasts, gold accents decorated the seems and a white skirt pooled around her feet underneath the blue silk.

"You're... you look beautiful Hitomi."

A light blush rose to her cheeks. She had never seen him like this, she'd never experienced Van in such a vulnerable state; he was always so guarded. His eyes were bloodshot, making his irises seem even more intense. A lazy smile appeared on his face as he looked at her; he was completely content just staring at her. Hitomi couldn't help but feel her affection grow.

"Van let me take you to your room," she laughed.

"Good idea," he said.

Carefully she slid between him and the door to act as a replacement support; Van, however, protested.

"Can you walk?" Hitomi asked sensing his reluctance.

"_Can I walk_? Of course I can walk!" Van laughed.

Hitomi allowed him to attempt walking on his own but quickly discovered he was not able to do it.

"Van let me help you," Hitomi offered her support, which Van reluctantly accepted.

As they walked the short distance down the hall to Van's room his hand slid down to her waist and pulled her ever so slightly closer to him. This didn't go unnoticed by Hitomi, considering she was completely sober. As they arrived at his door she opened it to the dimly lit room, a small lantern burned in the corner. Carefully Hitomi guided his body through the doorway and to the four poster bed. Removing her arm from around his waist she made a move to leave, however he was quick enough to grab her arm and stop her.

"Don't go," he breathed as he closed his eyes.

Hitomi didn't say anything she just went over his words in her head. He could have said _where are you going _or _goodnight_ or a plethora of other things but he didn't. He didn't even say 'please' to make it a request or plea; it was a demand.

Hitomi allowed him to draw her closer to him and weave his arms around her waist. Afraid he would collapse onto her she stepped back so she had the support of one of the bed posts behind her. To her surprise he didn't transfer his weight onto her, instead he gingerly pressed his forehead against hers and brought one hand to her cheek. She had never known him to be this languid with romantic gestures, the thought of Allen giving Van lessons in wooing a lady crossed her mind, however something made her think that Allen didn't have it in him to pull off drunk this well.

She could feel the heat of his body through her dress like a burning sensation, where his palm and fingertips delicately singed the top of her skin.

"Van... I..." she started but couldn't figure out what to say.

Hitomi's arms lay limply at her sides, she didn't know whether she should encourage him or not. When she wanted it too, was it considered taking advantage when he was the instigator?

He could tell that she was having an internal battle with herself, about what, he didn't know but he knew she was over analyzing everything that was happening.

"Don't think..." he breathed.

His voice quickly pierced through her thoughts and she was able to look up at him. He carefully brought his mouth down to hers and delicately covered her lips with his own.

Her body tensed, it hadn't been the first time she'd been kissed and regrettably Allen had been the first to kiss her. Van pulled away noting her discomfort but didn't let her go. His hand slid down her neck and down her bare shoulder, while he pressed his mouth against her jaw line. Anticipating the direction he was traveling, she felt him undo the clasp of the necklace she had on and allow it fall to the floor. The heat of his mouth quickly replaced the cold metal that previously resided there, his teeth grazing against her skin.

"No..." she weakly protested letting a sigh escape as his touch aroused her.

At her protest he did move away, which wasn't what she expected him to do. At that point she was staring into his glazed over eyes, trying grasp what she was feeling and he was thinking. Suddenly the only thought that came to her mind was when he had asked for her to stay with him the day she kissed Allen. Those words that haunted her..._I want you...I want you._

"I want you..." she breathed, arching her back towards him.

Bravely she reached her hand up so it was on the back of his neck and pulled his face closer to hers. Their noses were touching now, his face was so close hers she wanted so badly to kiss him but didn't feel she had the courage. The more she stared at his barely parted lips the more she found herself questioning her bravery. However, she was saved when he brought his mouth back down on hers. This time she could feel the heat behind the action, like a spark finally igniting. She could feel herself subconsciously responding to the sensation of his mouth and just as quickly as it was there it seemed to vanish.

He could feel her desperately trying to hold onto his lips, delicately lifting her chin up to brush her mouth against his. She couldn't help herself, she had succumbed to him so much that there was nothing else she could hold back. Opening her eyes slightly she watched him staring down at her; she loved the way he looked at her, even in his drunken stupor.

Just as she was able to wrap her head around a cohesive thought he stopped it. His mouth was against hers again, this time his passion was in full force as she voluntarily opened her mouth, which he quickly took advantage of.

Her hands weaved through his grasp on her to the collar of his shirt. Frantically she began pulling at the ties of his shirt and brought her hands down to the hem and lifted the light material up.

"I want you inside me..." she breathed quickly as their mouths separated to allow the shirt to come off.

Instead of bringing his mouth back to hers he buried his head in the crook of her neck and gathered bunches of her dress in his hands. There was far too much material in this dress he thought. Gently Van moved her body so that he was able to lie her down on the bed, which she went to willingly.

Once she was safely on the bed he climbed over her and met her longing lips again with his own. His hands sliding the skirts of her dress up around her waist, so that her bare legs were on either side of him. Considering she had nothing to compare it to his smoothness went unnoticed. Gently she raked her nails against his chest and down to the top of his pants, allowing her to feel her way to undo them. Once they were unlaced she brought her hands back up to bury in his hair.

While neither of them were fully unclothed there was enough uncovered to achieve their goal. Carefully positioning himself, he pushed into her causing an unexpectedly loud gasp to erupt from her, which he quickly stifled with a kiss. Once he felt her relax beneath him he removed his mouth.

"I'm sorry," she whimpered, gripping her arms around his neck she managed to rock her pelvis back and forth along with him.

She tried her hardest not to make any loud noises but the more they moved the harder it became. Her breath caught in her throat as he moved into her more. She pressed her teeth into his skin and gently sucked on his neck as she tried to distract herself. As much as she wanted him, she didn't realize the pain she would have to overcome.

With the final thrust she was able to release a final cry of his name before her body let her know it was over.

Finally it was over, relief washed over her as she allowed her body to relax beneath him. She released her arms from his neck as he stayed towering above her, one arm on either side of her head for support.

She couldn't look away from his stare; his red eyes, the moonlight highlighting the sculpture of his face.

"Do you regret it?" he breathed.

"No... it just hurt," she whispered, lifting her body to kiss him.

* * *

**So soon? I know, but don't lie you all wanted it. Thank you for reviewing, those that have, and I would love to hear more!**

Her hands encircled his wrists affectionately


	4. Still

**LOOK AT YOU! Reviewing! Thank you so so much my dears, it means a great deal to me. I think this might be short, just so I have something out there, cause the last ones have been unintentionally long. Yo, over four thousand words! I didn't have to write essays that long for school! what is that!**

**...um so I've been working on this off and on... and today something happened... for the second time in my life. I lost a really good friend. She just decided she didn't want to be friends with me, and I've been more than a plain friend with her... and yet I'm still the one that loses. I don't really know how to deal with it and I feel stuck. I'm so upset I feel sick... I need help.  
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Sun.

Sun was good, but not today.

Van was lying across his bed still in his boots and pants from the night before, the only reason he realized he was shirtless was because of the breeze blowing through his window. His head hung off the bed allowing his blood to drain to the top of his scull. As soon as he realized he was awake he was ready to jab his sword into his pulsing temples.

With a loud groan he rolled onto his stomach so he was staring at the floor. His body was weak and aching everywhere, it wasn't like pain from training all day, it was like he was sick. His head was pounding and the fact that the sun was so unnecessarily jolly at that present moment irritated him.

Covering his eyes with one hand, he attempted to shift himself into a sitting position.

The energy required to do this was a lot higher than he was willing to put in but nonetheless he did it. Once sitting he was able to scour the room to see if anything jerked his memory from the night before.

"What the hell happened last night-" and then he spotted his shirt on the floor by the bottom of the bed.

All of a sudden his memory wasn't so foggy. He remembered kissing her and forcing himself on her and the fact that he hadn't even questioned what he was doing. No matter how much he tried to coax himself to look at the positive side he couldn't help but feel guilty. He'd put his own desire over his duties and responsibilities as nobility and more importantly, he'd placed them above her will.

A deep sinking feeling took over his stomach, he felt like he would vomit. Luckily, it was only a mental reaction, not physical.

He looked down noticing his pants were undone and felt rather embarrassed that he's kept his shoes on. More of a job than real love making; quick and efficient, done out of convenience rather than desire.

"Get 'er done," he mumbled, raking a hand through his hair.

With that he rolled over and planted his face into one of his pillows. The sudden light blockage added a slight amount of relief to his agony until a knock at the door haulted his

Van didn't answer.

Upon that, Dryden proceeded to enter the room and started laughing at the sight of Van face down on his bed.

"Rough night?"

"You have no idea," Van murmured.

"Ah, you're not as bad as I thought you'd be," Dryden said approaching the bed, "here, drink this and put these on."

Dryden set down a glass of blue liquid and a pair of tinted eye-glasses on the table next to the bed. Van carefully turned his face so he was looking at the two objects Dryden brought in.

"What is it?' Van asked groggily.

"Think of it as a hangover remedy," Dryden said.

"That's what this is? A _hangover_?" Van asked.

"Yep, I've been known to have a few in my day. You're a lot more pleasant than Millerna is, that's for sure...but we'll keep that between us," Dryden said.

"I don't need glasses Dryden..." Van said.

"Just try them out...they're not what you think," Dryden clarified, "now hurry up and get ready, we're waiting for you downstairs."

"All of you?" Van asked as soon as the words processed through his mind.

"Don't worry, this'll be our secret."

With that Dryden left Van alone with his thoughts and remedies. After taking a rather large swig, he made an attempt to get ready. Unfortunately the thought of Dryden knowing whether he had sex worried him. After he was finished he grabbed the glasses from the table, fixing them on his face before he went downstairs. The improvement was incredible, the light diminishing made a huge difference on the pounding of his head.

* * *

It was awkward.

His hopes of her not remembering were crushed as soon as he entered the room. Immediately he became everyone's focus and his thoughts went directly to the idea that Hitomi had told them what had happened.

"Good morning Lord Van!" Merle squealed and ran over to latch onto his arm.

His worries were put to rest, if Merle knew he had been with Hitomi her affection for him would definitely have wavered.

"Did you sleep well?" she asked.

Van gulped and nodded.

"Why are you wearing those?" Millerna asked.

"Uh..." Van started, he couldn't admit he was hungover, not only would he look bad as a king but Allen would surely have something to say about it.

"They're sunglasses," Hitomi interjected, knowing exactly what he was thinking.

"What are those?" Millerna asked.

"Dryden wears them Millerna," Hitomi said.

"You don't mean to tell me Van's taking fashion advice from Dryden...do you?" Millerna asked seriously.

Dryden started laughing, "does that really sound so bizarre Millerna?"

"Yes Dryden," Millerna stated, "did you want something to eat Van?"

Van shook his head, cringing at the idea of ingesting something.

"You look pale Van, are you sure you're not hungry?" Allen asked.

"I'm sure," Van said.

He'd never been in a situation this awkward before, in fact he'd never been in an awkward situation. Sure there were a lot of uncomfortable moments, but none like this , where he could safely say it was awkward. After he'd seen Allen and Hitomi kiss, he'd felt uncomfortable and hurt, but not awkward. He had no idea what to say, ans seeing as they didn't have a problem it wouldn't work to just walk away, actually that might make matters even worse! They'd be confused!

"Has there been any news?" Van finally asked.

"No but we have reason to believe that Ubdo is involved," Allen said.

"Ubdo? You mean the holy spring? Where they construct energists?" Van asked.

Allen nodded.

"But what the hell would they want there?" Van asked.

"I'm sorry, quick question, I thought energists came from dragons," Hitomi inquired.

"_Drag-_energists do, an Energist alone indirectly, or directly comes from Ubdo," Van answered.

"I thought it was a myth," Millerna exclaimed.

"What use would Ubdo be to them?" Van asked.

"Think about it: Ubdo is the place where gods go to purify themselves. It sounds like a perfect place to obtain a pure power that they need," Dryden said, "a simple Drag-energist wouldn't be powerful enough for the Aegis people."

"So that's who it is?" Van asked.

"But Aegis is so small, why would they do something like this?" Allen asked.

Even in Van's hungover stupor he was able to see the logic in it, as well as wonder why Allen couldn't, "it's obvious why; such a small village, constantly being underestimated by other cities. It's a strategy to get respect, so to speak, to establish a name for themselves. The tactics are extreme but I can understand the motivation. A better question would be how?"

Allen didn't look please that Van had come up with a counter for his statement, however he was able to acknowledge the relevance of it.

"I don't know, but the idea clearly spawned from the last war and the Atlantis machine. I guess the fact that such a small civilization became so powerful and prosperous triggered something, and gods and angels seemed to be the connection there..." Allen mused.

"I just don't get how this is going to help us, it's a different battle than with Zaibach, it's more evasive..." Dryden said.

"What are you saying?" Van asked.

"We have to wait for them," Allen answered.

"But who knows how long that could be," Van complained, "we need to take action! I won't stand by while they get stronger."

"You can't act without knowing what you're up against Van," Allen told him.

At this point Van had forgotten about the awkwardness that was once there and was fully engaged in his argument with Allen and Dryden.

Finally after a long while of back and forth arguing Hitomi jumped in, "stop it Van! Why can't you understand what they're saying? They're trying to help you and you're being so pig-headed about it. Don't you see that you're actions could have counter productive reactions! Didn't you learn anything from Dornkirk! Every action has and equal and opposite reaction, without knowing what you're acting against you could make things worse!"

Everyone was silent. Van stood there wide eyed not knowing what to say to her. She wasn't Allen or Dryden, she had this irritating ability of setting him straight and clarifying when he was wrong. She wasn't a normal girl who would just side with him, she knew when to call him out. However his anger got the best of him and he found it impossible to make eye contact with anyone. He hated that she had subjected him to that kind of scrutiny, that she had publicly called him out on his rashness in front of them, that was why she wasn't allowed in meetings.

"Van, we'll see what we can do...about arranging some sort of plan," Allen said, feeling a bit for Van. Even though he was thankful to Hitomi for getting through to Van, he was still able to understand the mild humiliation Van was feeling, "but for now I think we should drop it."

"Good. Thank you. Allen, Dryden," Van said leaving the room, with Merle hot on his heels.

Millerna and Dryden left choosing to leave the situation before they became involved, even though they didn't know what the situation was exactly.

"I know you must think I'm getting emotional Allen, but he has to know when he's wrong," Hitomi protested.

"I understand, Hitomi," Allen said, choosing not to take the subject further.

* * *

Van had made his way to the roof to train, although it was more along the lines of blowing off steam. He was angry that people always over looked him, especially Hitomi. Even though she loved him, it seemed that she found him a complete joke when it came to governmental matters.

"I'm a fucking King! You'd think there'd be some authority in that," Van grunted swinging his blade.

He'd never played that card before but it felt like it was his only option, Kings were given respect and not questioned but because of his age and temperament he was always second guessed.

He was so immersed in his heated thought that he didn't notice when Hitomi came to join him.

"Van," she said.

As soon as he heard her speak he controlled his sword and stopped sharply, "what."

He could see her wince in his periphery and suddenly felt shame in his actions and turned to face her.

"You know... I think you're the first person that I can't seem to get anything right with..." she laughed sadly.

He stayed silent and looked at the floor.

"Say something...please," Hitomi begged.

This wasn't about today, it was about last night; she was hurting and needed him. It hadn't been what she wanted for her first time and he could tell that she was battling with it.

"I..." he started.

"You just...acted like nothing happened... and then it was awkward! I don't want to have to keep things like that a secret. I want to be able to love you without feeling ashamed or uncomfortable about it," Hitomi said.

Van sheathed his sword and looked at her, he knew she wanted him to say something but he had no idea what the right thing was. She'd started crying, she'd come back to Gaea for this?

"Why am I here?" she sobbed, "what am I doing?"

As she started to walk to the stairway he called her back, "Hitomi...stay."

Hitomi turned around expecting him to say more but he was on his way over to her. He stopped a few inches away from her and watched her we eyes follow him.

"Van... I-" she started but his lips got in the way of her continuing. A gentle kiss with just enough in it to tell her how much he wanted her. He had her face cradled in both of his hands, tilted to meet his lips. He gently sucked on her bottom lip before breaking from her and rested his forehead against hers, leaving their lips only millimeters apart.

"I love you," he breathed.

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**Thanks for a read, and make me feel good maybe?**


	5. Supernatural

**Hey, so I don't have too much to say... just...maybe review please?**

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Hitomi had been back on Gaea for two weeks now and she was finally settling back into her role there. The only difference was that every now and then there would be a stolen moment, away from everyone else that granted her a few moments of complete bliss with Van. However, they remained stolen and private, the fact that they were acting upon their love remained secret. She understood why on a political level but she couldn't understand on a personal level why they needed to have that part of their life, which was debatably the most important part, hidden.

These thoughts plagued her; her over-active mind would constantly go over every detail about what he would do and wouldn't. She over analyzed everything; she didn't understand why she didn't understand and it drove her crazy. She'd lost sleep thinking about him and wanting him and wondering whether he was battling the same hormones she was. Celibacy didn't work, to promote abstinence seemed wrong in a way; if young unwed people needed each other like this, why was it wrong. It was the same concept as hunger or thirst, if they body craved it, it was a natural reaction. Why was the need for sex so taboo in comparison to every other natural human instinct; sex, no matter which way you looked at it, was a form of survival.

However there was also the other side of the argument, which was his side. His being a human man aside, he was a king, he wasn't allowed to be human. He was one in the same with the gods, and even on Gaea there was a purity to gods, they didn't make mistakes like the lowly human being did, and thus Van could not be human. Although, he wasn't even fully human, which made matters worse. If anything he was closer to being a god than anyone else, the most pure human would still rank beneath him all because of the Draconian blood flowing through his veins.

"God damn it!" Hitomi grunted, throwing the sheets off herself.

She lay in her bed, wide awake trying to escape her sexual frustration.

"I thought men were the ones who had trouble getting any," Hitomi grumbled, getting out of bed.

She walked into the room that acted as an ensuite, basically the Gaean equivalent to a bathroom. It was actually quite remarkable, considering they did have plumbing and heated water. The technology was so different to Earth but still produced the same outcome, it was like they had different elements or something. Also, where Earth needed to have a completely scientific realistic explanation for anything out of the ordinary happening, Gaea simply acknowledged it and accepted the idea that there could be a magical force behind it.

Hitomi stared at herself in the mirror lined room, she was wearing a long cotton nightgown that covered everywhere from the neck down.

"It's like a drop cloth," Hitomi mused, "the men on this planet must have incredible imaginations."

As a way of rebelling she undid the ties at her throat, why she had done them up all the way in the first place she didn't know. Her clavicle was fully exposed now, allowing some air to reach her skin.

She was fully awake now, there was no point in going back to bed just to toss and turn until the sun came up.

Of course she had another agenda, which involved a certain king that wasn't Dryden.

As she walked through the dark halls of the palace her interest in sex slowly drifted. The loneliness of a place so big began to consume her and she felt a terrible longing for home. She tried to sneak Van into her thoughts to help the feeling go away but all she wanted was the reassurance of her safe home back on Earth. She wanted to see her mother and father, she didn't want to be reminded of city sounds or anything like that, she just wanted the vastness and uncertainty of Gaea to go away for a while and let her feel familiarity once more.

She didn't expect it at all, the emotions came over her like a sneak attack. She was suddenly overwhelmed with homesickness. She wanted to feel loved and needed, and although she knew she was on Gaea, she needed it to be more clear. The implications and friendliness were not enough, she wanted a direct statement that let her know how loved she was. It was almost an irrational sadness; she couldn't be angry at anyone for not understanding where she was coming from or what she wanted as solace but she wanted to be. Customs were different here and they were not built around people's feelings. For the first time she could see the hardness of the little planet.

That's when she saw it. The door to his room was right there, she had subconsciously stopped right where the end to her suffering was sleeping. Without any sort of hesitation or fear she placed her hand on the golden doorknob and turned it silently. There was a blue light to his room, the moon mixed with the dark blue sky and flooded his room with the eerie, pale light.

She could see him sleeping; the shallow rise and fall of his chest while he breathed and the slight glint of her pendant as it caught the light. Quietly she walked to the bed and up climbed beside him. She hadn't intended to wake him but she watched as his eyes opened to reveal the deep garnet irises. He was silent as he just looked at her, like he sensed her turmoil. She in turn stared back at him and lowered her body close to his, and took hold of his hand in both of hers.

"Hitomi..." he whispered.

She closed her eyes and allowed his voice to resonate. Immediately she could feel her body loosen, it was more than relaxation it was the beginning of the comfort that she so desperately sought.

He felt tears drop onto his bare shoulder and run down to his scapula. He reacted immediately, shifting so that he was propped up on his elbow and forearm, with her face cupped delicately in his hand.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

Hitomi shut her eyes as fresh tears fell and pressed her cheek into his palm. This was the start she was looking for, she needed this tenderness from him no matter what the situation was.

She shook her head subtly, while keeping her eyes closed, "I don't know..."

He knew she wasn't able to understand it herself or else she would have been angry at the emotion and been very articulate when he asked her what the problem was. This was something deeper that was plaguing her soul, a real sadness that needed to be ended and so very easily he kissed her. To her own surprise, she wasn't startled by his action. Instead she accepted his offer quickly and parted her lips to kiss him more intently. As the kiss deepened she brought her hands away from his and reached for the back of his neck to pull him closer, while sliding her body beneath him.

"Make love to me," she whispered. This wasn't a request, it was an order, it was what she needed.

This time they were both stone cold sober, while perhaps a little sleep deprived, they were fully aware of what their bodies were doing.

He carefully slid the hem of her floor length night gown along her legs and up to her waist. The feeling of his hot skin running along her legs propelled her to move closer to him, to feel him more. He moved his mouth along her jaw line and seared her skin with his lips all the way to her shoulder, at which point he easily slipped the top of the sleeve down to her elbow, leaving her breast barely covered. Her insecurities were fleeting as he poised his mouth on her sternum, while his hand reached out to hers and interlaced their fingers.

Some part of her knew he seemed to be doing all the foreplay but it didn't really matter to her. Running a hand along his ribs she reached around to his back, to see if those angelical wings made a difference to his bone structure. While nothing felt out of the ordinary there was a more intense heat radiating from his shoulder blades.

Finally he brought his mouth back to hers, delicately reaching underneath the fabric of the nightgown so their skin made contact.

With skill she didn't know she possessed, she managed to lower the top of his pants with her foot and with his other hand he assisted her the rest of the way.

This time was different, while it wasn't the bliss she was expecting it was easier than the first time. Carefully he changed positions with her, so that he was beneath her. As she sat up the nightgown draped off one of her shoulders completely exposing one of her breasts. As he brought his hands to her hips she lowered her torso onto his and allowed him to guide her gently. This was more painful for her than him but she trusted him too much to let something happen to her.

She bit down slightly harder on his lip when he moved underneath her, piercing the skin. Luckily he didn't seem to notice his pain and quickly tried to distract her from her own. He, again, moved so she was beneath him with her arms gripping firmly around his neck. She kissed his neck heatedly as he moved with her, sweat beads beginning to appear on both of them as their heart rates increased.

At some point he had released her from the sleeves of her nightgown, and it pooled around her waist with the rest of it. Her body was pressed against his, skin to skin, sweat mixing, both trying to stifle their moans in the other's body.

* * *

Hitomi woke up in her own room, alone. Her night with Van might as well have never happened. They were the only two that knew and there was nothing to prove that they had been intimate, only their memories. No token of love or anything like that, another stolen moment; a beautiful moment never to be spoken of. Hitomi pulled the once sweat covered material of her nightgown to her nose; it smelled like him, even his sweat smelled good. His scent brought her back to the feeling of his skin against hers and the heat of his body. She'd never been in contact with anyone who radiated that much warmth.

The sun peered into her bedroom, lighting up all the shadows and revealing the emptiness of the place. This wasn't what she wanted.

Her feelings from last night returned and this time she couldn't run to Van to get rid of them. She would have to go an entire day without feeling him.

* * *

"It seems that people are disappearing," Allen mused, as he sat in the large dining hall with both Dryden and Van.

"From where?" Van asked.

" Some of the villages in the Floresta Mountains are experiencing many disappearances, of particularly children," Allen said.

"Why do they always go after kids..." Dryden questioned rhetorically as he scratched the back of his head.

"Because they're easy to take advantage of," Allen said.

"Whoa, no need to get defensive there Allen, " Dryden said.

"This isn't a light matter," Allen said calmly.

"You think the disappearances have something to do with Aegis' plan?" Van asked.

Allen nodded.

"I'm willing to go on that, " Van said looking at Dryden, "even if they aren't linked, something is happening."

Dryden scratched his chin.

"They have to have some kind of alliance with another country, they can't be doing this on their own," Van said.

"What are you implying Van?" Allen asked.

"All their abilities aren't advanced enough to pull of a maneuver like this, they have to be working with someone." he said.

"Like who? Zaibach's no longer a threat Van, " Allen told him.

"I know, I was there, " Van retorted quickly, " what about Basram?"

They were all silent for a second.

"Think about it, it makes sense. Basram is right beside Asturia, it would be easy for them to take people from Floresta, not to mention their technology rivaled Zaibach's, they definitely have the ability to pull it off. Their constant progression could only lead to this," Van said standing up.

"But Basram would have no need to do something like this, they have enough power-" Allen started.

"That's the point! No country needs to start something like this-" Van said.

"Van, they're a republican government, not an empire, they don't need to this," Dryden said.

"Don't you remember what happened during the war!" Van exclaimed, "after they used their weapon and destroyed almost all of Zaibach's army, they turned on everyone. Cesario too!"

"Van, you can't-" Allen started but Van cut him off.

"They wanted to take over Gaea! This is them acting it out!" Van said.

Upon that Hitomi had entered the room to hear the end of what Dryden had said.

"What are you guys talking about?" she asked.

Van gave her a quick look and stayed silent, feeling that no matter what he said she would disagree.

"The nation of Basram, Van thinks that they have something to do with it, because of their technological sophistication. We're arguing that it doesn't make sense considering the way they are governed. A nation that developed doesn't pull things like that to gain more power over other countries, " Dryden said.

"What kind of government is it?" Hitomi asked.

Dryden let out a short laugh, the very notion of a woman trying to keep up with him amused him, "don't worry Hitomi, we'll sort it out."

Hitomi grew red with anger but composed herself, "humor me."

"They don't have a monarch, instead they have a...head of state who acts on behalf of what the people want. They allow their citizens to have an impact on the country's government," Dryden said airily.

"So a republic," Hitomi stated.

Dryden gave her an odd look, thinking she'd been listening a lot earlier than she claimed.

"We have those on Earth... almost every country is a republic, or started that way, then evolved to democracy. There are almost no monarchies anymore, there are a few royal families but they have almost no say in what happens with the government." Hitomi said.

All of them stared at her, not sure what was more surprising, the fact that she understood political conversation or that Earth had no monarchies.

"Anyway, it sounds completely possible that Basram could be doing this. One power hungry person of the senate, I mean look what happened in Rome. It was an amazing civilization that is still considered one of the most impressive civilizations to date, it started as a republic and turned into an Empire, which eventually led to their demise," Hitomi said.

Van smiled a little, which only Hitomi caught.

"They were incredibly advanced and they still fell," Hitomi said.

Dryden stayed silent and started to think, as did Allen, whereas Van mouthed a quick thank you to her before she left the room.

She could feel her sadness ease up a little at the small kindness he offered her.

* * *

Hitomi was sitting on the edge of the fountain after completing a rather intense run. That was something that she felt good about, it was an easy way to release stress and get some endorphins going. It could cheer her up at least a little.

"Hitomi?" Allen called, walking over to her.

"Allen," Hitomi exclaimed.

"How are you?" he asked.

"Fine, how are you?" she asked.

"I'm doing well thank you, I wanted to talk to you about what you said earlier," he said.

"Oh...I see,"

"Was what you said true? About ...Rome?"

Hitomi nodded, "this was around the same time as Atlantis, although, on Earth we just thought of Atlantis as a myth. However it seems everything we deemed on Earth to be myth seems to be true here."

A small smile touched her features as she looked at the two planets in the sky.

"I think you should trust Van on this one," Hitomi said after a few minutes of silence, "I know he can be impulsive but he has good instincts."

"Hitomi, you really are something," Allen said.

"What do you mean?"

"Your faith in people, in Van. It's so admirable," he said.

"Allen, you have no reason to admire me," Hitomi smiled, "do you have anything planned for Basram?"

"We plan on paying a visit to their head of state. We don't want to act in violence without trying reason first; fighting is always the last option," Allen said.

Hitomi nodded and smiled, "how is it you're still available Allen?"

"I gave up on women when you left me Hitomi, " he said softly.

Hitomi's eyes grew wide and her discomfort level sky-rocketed.

"Just kidding!" he exclaimed, as Hitomi practically soiled herself.

She released a large sigh of relief and clapped Allen on the back, 'phew! I was ready to pee."

While trying not to look a little phased by her expression and reaction he laughed a little, 'don't sound so relieved Hitomi."

"Oh I'm sorry Allen! That was rude of me!" she laughed.

"I understand Hitomi, but to answer your question I just haven't been able to. I've been quite busy with my sister," he explained.

"Oh my goodness! I didn't even think to ask! How is Celena?"

"She's improving, it takes time, she has to catch up on a lot," Allen said.

"I bet... it's like autism..." Hitomi mused.

"Autism?" Allen asked.

Hitomi looked at him, "it's mentally disabled, that's what we call it on Earth."

"Celena isn't mentally disabled, she's been toyed with by Zaibach's magic, which stopped her brain development as a human girl," he defended.

"I didn't mean that there was something wrong with her Allen, I was just trying to relate it to something I could understand, " Hitomi said.

Allen could see she was not trying to offend him or his sister and quickly felt ashamed of his actions, "I apologize Hitomi, I didn't mean to go off on you like that. I do hope you'll forgive me."

Hitomi smiled, "don't worry about it. I understand."

Allen once again felt the calmness wash over his heart that he felt three years ago. The peace that Hitomi brought to his life.

"Van is a lucky man, Hitomi, I hope you know that," Allen said kindly.

"thank you Allen, "

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**Hey, so thank you for reading and maybe you could give me something to read? In the form of a review perhaps?**


	6. Brain Damage

**Hey guys... I'm so fast at this updating business! I should get some kind of recognition... I wish they had things like that, where the readers could give the author feedback for being so dedicated and fabulous. I wish eh?**

**Whoa dude, that totally just gave away my Canadian-ness... well there it is. **

**WHOOOO I just realized I've been spelling Allen's last name wrong! How embarrassing... that's something I really hate, when people can't spell a main character's name properly and there I go doing it! There's a word for people like that... I don't know if it's been invented yet but I'm going to call myself a hypocrite because that's how I do.  
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"I want to go with you Van," Hitomi complained.

They were standing in his room arguing. He hadn't said no, but Dryden and Allen seemed to be against it in case she pulled something again.

"Hitomi, I can't let you," he said.

"What do you mean?"

"We need to do this alone, to discuss this matter alone with Basram," Van said.

"Why Van? I don't see the problem I would cause!" Hitomi protested.

"Hitomi, can't you just stay here, for this one?" Van pleaded.

"No! I won't stay here while you're doing something like this! I can reason just as well as-"

She hadn't been able to finish due to his lips getting in the way. He'd seized her face with both hands and covered her mouth with his to get her to shut-up and agree with him. Unfortunately he ended up kissing her longer than he should have and got mildly carried away so that when he pulled away he was almost as disoriented as she was.

"Just stay here..." he breathed, and walked out of the room, leaving Hitomi slightly bewildered.

* * *

"How long does it take to get to Basram?" Hitomi asked Millerna as they waved to the leaving ship.

"Maybe a day at the absolute most," Millerna said.

"But they're right beside each other!" Merle griped.

"They're two very big countries Merle, you know how long it takes to get to Palas from Fanelia," Millerna said.

"Fine... point taken," Merle mumbled.

"How long do you think it will take?" Hitomi asked.

Millerna shrugged, "we've never been up against something like this. I don't know what they'd say, either of them. It's not like they're warning them against an attack, they're trying to reason with them about the work they're doing."

"Who knows how long that'll take," Merle said.

"And we're just supposed to wait for them?" Hitomi complained.

"What would you have us do Hitomi?" Millerna said turning to face her.

Hitomi didn't have an answer for her, with all her complaining there wasn't anything she could propose to make their waiting move any faster.

"Why do women always get shafted," Hitomi grumbled sitting against the glass window. The ship was finally disappearing into the horizon therefore there was nothing to look at.

"Shafted?" Merle asked sitting next to her, leaving Millerna the only one standing.

"We're not treated the same as men," Hitomi clarified.

"Is it different on the Mystic Moon?" Merle asked.

Hitomi paused before answering, "we're still not treated the same way, it's a bit more subtle maybe but there's still favoritism with men."

"I guess our worlds aren't too far off.." Millerna said.

"Millerna, shouldn't you be sitting down?" Hitomi asked.

"I can't quite make it down there with you two," she said.

"I wonder why," Merle teased.

"Merle, you'll know why soon enough. Although I can't see anyone being interested in you-" Millerna said.

"Why I oughta!" Merle yelled scrambling to attack Millerna, luckily Hitomi was able to suppress her before any harm came to the Queen.

"Millerna, was that really necessary?" Hitomi asked.

"I don't know, was her comment?" Millerna retorted coolly.

"Come on you two!" Hitomi almost laughed, "I thought I was the one you fought with."

"Oh it'll happen, just wait. We're going easy on you right now," Merle said, "I mean Millerna's picking fights for two now, so it'll be like three people sooner or later!"

"One more time cat," Millerna threatened.

"Or what?"

"Have you noticed we're right by the sea?" Millerna said,"water is big in Asturia."

Hitomi started laughing. Millerna was quite the firecracker when you got her going, and she was far better at comebacks than she was.

* * *

Sailing had been smooth and the Crusade arrived in Basram within four hours. As they approached the capital city they spotted the leviship docking station making a quick transition from flight to landing.

"I've never been somewhere so...developed," Van stated as they unloaded.

"Impressive eh?" Dryden said, throwing his arm around Van.

"Uh...yeah...I guess," Van agreed awkwardly. Dryden was too touchy-feely, there was no question whether Van liked him there were just times when he became invasive to personal space.

"So I guess we-" Allen started when a band of people approached the three of them.

"On behalf of the republic, we demand you declare yourselves," one of them yelled as he approached them.

For some reason Van started laughing, he'd never been in such an informal situation that was forcing a formal introduction.

"I am Allen Schezar, Knight of Caeli, this is Van Fanel; King of Fanelia and this is Dryden Fassa, King of Asturia, we are here to request an audience with the senate," Allen said clearly.

"My name is Urbis, I am the head of state. It is a pleasure to meet you all. I hope that you seek what you desire here in Basram," he said.

Van gave a skeptical look to Dryden who in turn looked back at Urbis and began to follow along with Allen.

As they walked through the incredible city they began to see how backward their own countries were. Every building maintained an unfathomable height, which didn't seem possible for buildings to reach, however that was not the most impressive quality to the city. Every structure was sculpted from the same obscure crystal, that none of them had ever seen before. Now it was said the Gaea was a world of magic and each country maintained their own indigenous treasure however this crystal was truly magnificent.

Van had heard stories about Basram's intricate construction and the incredible beauty of it but he hadn't expected anything so different to what he was used to. He had heard of the magic contained within Basram, it was a widely known fact that along with advanced technology there was indeed a great deal of sorcery as well. While it was nothing to fear, each nation had a relatively _magical_ aspect to it, it was always made note of the Basram was famous for it.

As they entered one of the immaculate crystal buildings the sense of wonder didn't stop. Pillars of silver lined the long hallway and the glass ceilings allowed the sunlight to reflect off everything in room, creating an endless enclosure of light.

"This is pretty fancy..." Dryden mused.

"You like it?" Urbis inquired perking up,"we're very proud of our city."

'I can imagine," Allen stated.

"Now, if you'll all join me in the senate room I can give you what you desire," Urbis said, motioning for them to follow him down the hallway.

As the four of them entered, five men sat on either side of the room while a large chair on a pedestal sat directly in the center of the wall. Urbis left the three of them to stand in front of the foreboding chair as he went to sit in it. All off a sudden the focus switched from the three foreigners to Urbis.

"You have requested an audience with the senate of Basram, Allen Schezar, Lord Fanel and Lord Fassa," Urbis stated, "to what, does your business here pertain to?"

Even though Van knew it was inappropriate he couldn't help feeling that even though the republican system didn't require them to bow, the monarchy protocol seemed more than called for at the time. However, he remained standing like Dryden and Allen.

"We have come to ask you about your Draconian project," Allen said.

Urbis was silent for a moment before he spoke, his beady black eyes forming into slits as a smile spread on his fat little face, "so you've heard."

"We want to ask you to consider what you're doing, and what it could mean for Gaea," Allen said.

"Which is what?" Urbis asked amused.

"The Draconians brought on their own demise with their unquenchable thirst for more power. I can't let that happen again," Allen said.

"We have no such desire to create a fate machine, Allen, our goal is simply to improve the human genome. If people are able to fly without the constraint of machine we will truly be the superior species," Urbis said.

"We're already the superior species," Dryden interrupted.

"Pardon me Dryden, do you mind if I call you Dryden? But think about it, if you had the power to sprout wings like the Draconians, to be able to soar through the sky at any time to feel your unbeatable power, that development in the human genetic structure would be ground breaking," Urbis explained.

Both Dryden and Allen gave Van subtle stares before looking back at Urbis.

"You're experimenting on children and exploiting nations far less privileged than yours, you're taking advantage of those you think are weaker than you," Allen said.

"Allen, these people are disposable, they are of no importance to you or I, what harm is it if they don't last," Urbis asked.

"You find the experimentation on children justifiable?" Van seethed.

Urbis seemed to ignore Van's venom, "if one insignificant regular human child is sacrificed for a better more extraordinary race, then so be it."

"It's more than one, and at what point does it become too much?" Van asked.

For fear of getting on Urbis' bad side too quickly Dryden jumped in with a change in direction, "what business do you have with Ubdo?"

Urbis raised a furry eye-brow, "you're well informed I see. We're using the energist shards to plant into experiments to provide them with great power."

"You mean people," Van clarified, "tell me, how do you plan to make these wings? Are they permanent, will they always be exposed? By attaching something that isn't natural to a human being you deform them and make them fall victim to their appendage. Your gift will become a burden."

"Nonsense, however, you are right with your comment about the wings always being exposed. The Draconians had a different realm of power that we have, they seemed to be able to call upon their wings at any time and just as easily dismiss them..." Urbis trailed off, "which brings me to my next part of the operation. We test the blood of every experiment to see if they are a Draconian, if we find one we will use their blood as a model for our creations; copying the genetic structure of their demonic blood."

At Urbis' last statement Dryden and Allen braced themselves for Van's response, which didn't come. Instead he remained silent and continued to stare at the intolerant man before him.

"By modifying their blood, we can take them to Ubdo and purify them in the springs, and at the same time infuse them with unsurpassable power," Urbis continued.

"And your people know what you have to do in order to reach this goal?" Van asked.

"Our people know what they know, " Urbis said.

"You didn't answer my question," Van said.

"Van," Dryden grunted subtly.

Van shot him a quick glare before resuming his stare on Urbis.

"Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't that the point of a republic?" Van asked, his words dripping with venom.

Urbis picked up on Van's clear disdain for him but continued to allow it to pass.

"I wouldn't be criticizing another government if I were you," Urbis said smoothly.

"And just what do you mean by that!" Van demanded, taking a step forward.

"Get your own country in order before you start dictating about how others are run," Urbis told him coolly.

The red in his eyes became incredibly enhanced as both Allen and Dryden picked up on the rage Van was trying so hard to suppress.

"Urbis, what do you intend to do if the outcome is to your satisfaction?" Allen interjected.

Urbis paused, taking the time to appreciate the state he put Van in, before he answered, "we intend to create an indestructible empire of Gaea, unlike Zaibach we do not want to bring on Gaea's demise."

"But you know what happened with Zaibach, they wanted to become the most powerful empire with their Atlantis machine and that didn't work. You can't decide other people's fates!" Allen protested.

"We have always been more advanced than Zaibach; a rundown country trying to be something it wasn't meant for... we know better and we won't let you stop us from getting what we want Allen Schezar," Urbis said, putting the same emphasis on his last name as Dilandau did.

"What happens if you don't succeed?" Allen asked, "will your people accept that too?"

"It isn't a possible outcome,"Urbis said.

"God! Can't you see what you're doing? The threat you're causing! If people become a _superior_ race, what will happen to the rest of the people who were experimented on-who didn't make it? How can you be so ignorant!" Allen yelled.

"Clearly Allen's been hanging out with you too much your majesty," Dryden mumbled quietly to Van.

"I think you're finished Captian Schezar," Urbis concluded as he stood up.

That was it. There was nothing any of them could say after that, Urbis was finished and no matter how much they weren't there was nothing they could do to make him stay. Even if there was, Urbis was not the type of man that was easily swayed.

* * *

"Millerna?" Hitomi asked as the three of them stood outside hanging sheets.

"What? I shouldn't be doing this?" Millerna asked, "I don't care I need something to do, I hate waiting."

Hitomi gave her a sad smile, "no, that wasn't what I was going to ask you."

"Oh?"

"How far along are you?" Hitomi asked.

"Five months," Millerna asked reaching to close a peg over the line.

"Do you know what it is?" Hitomi asked.

Millerna shook her head, "now how would I know that?"

Hitomi smiled brightly, "good question. On Earth, we have machines that perform 'ultra-sounds' that allow you to look at your baby before its born and determine if its healthy or not, and of course see what the sex is."

Millerna and Merle were wide eyed.

"That's incredible," Millerna stated.

"That's _crazy_," Merle corrected.

"Are you happy about it?" Hitomi asked after a long silence.

"What do you mean?" Millerna asked.

"Having a baby," Hitomi said.

"What's not to be happy about, I'm the queen of Asturia; it's my duty as a wife and queen to provide heirs," Millerna recited.

"That's not what you say if you're happy about something. You shouldn't have to justify it," Hitomi said softly.

"Hitomi, I really don't appreciate you interrogating me like this," Millerna said.

"Millerna I'm not-" Hitomi started.

"Just leave it alone," Millerna said.

The whole time, Merle had stayed quiet. She knew it wasn't a good time to give her input, it only would have caused more problems. With that Millerna said nothing for the remainder of the time they were outside, she finished the chores and left the company of Hitomi and Merle.

"Was I wrong?" Hitomi asked.

"It did sound a little judgemental," Merle said.

"I didn't mean to," Hitomi said.

"I think you should talk to her, but wait, she won't want to listen to you right now," Merle said.

"How long?"

"Until they get back," Merle said, "she might feel better once Dryden's back."

"Who knows how long that could be," Hitomi whined.

"Leave her alone for now Hitomi," Merle said,"you'll get your chance soon enough."

* * *

_**Hope you enjoyed, now tell me something about it!**_

_**Thank you to all that reviewed up until now and thank you to all that do I sincerely appreciate it.  
**_


	7. You Are and So Am I

**HEYO! **

**So you fabulous readers you, here is the seventh chapter! **

**

* * *

**

Van had come into the Asturian palace livid. Dryden and Allen were hot on his heels trying to calm him down before he came in contact with anyone. There was a loud slam as he burst through the doors, clenching his fists and one hand on the hilt of his sword. He had one destination in his mind and he allowed nothing to cloud his vision. He made a direct route to the stairwell to get to the roof.

"Van!" Allen and Dryden called after him in vain.

Van didn't even falter, he just continued on his path as if he were insusceptible to all his surroundings.

"Van it's the middle of the night!" Allen yelled at him, but it went unheard.

The two other men stood alone in the foyer of the castle without any idea of what to do.

"Should we wake the women?" Dryden asked.

Allen shook his head, "what would be the use?"

Dryden shrugged and headed for the stairs, "just seems like the right thing to do."

* * *

Hitomi had been sitting out on the balcony due to the inability to sleep. Part of it was from her worrying about Van and most of it was what she had said to Millerna. Had she really been so cruel without noticing?

The thought plagued her to the point where she was actually losing sleep and she hated that she wasn't able to confront Millerna about it immediately. She hadn't meant to be spiteful but whether it was her intention or not that was the product of her action.

Suddenly a sound interrupted her thoughts. Hitomi looked around her to see if anyone was around but there was no sign of anything. As she listened more carefully she was able to determine that the sound was coming from above her.

"Van's back!" she squeaked, not realizing how excited she was.

Without bothering to get changed or get shoes on she ran to the nearest stairwell and climbed the stone steps to the roof of the palace.

There he was practicing.

Except there was something different about his movements. Usually he was calm and centered when he practiced but he seemed tense and too fast for normal training. The more she watched the more fearful she became, she sensed the same anger in him that she sensed when he was fighting Dilandau after he'd been repaired by the Ispano clan.

"What's wrong with him,"she thought aloud.

He hadn't noticed her as she moved closer to him, careful to keep an undetectable distance from him.

"Van..." Hitomi called timidly.

As soon as the sound reached him the blade stopped; the control he possessed even when in a frenzy was remarkable.

"What?" he responded quickly.

Hitomi winced at the harsh reaction of his tone.

"What's wrong?"

"I don't want to talk about it," he said without moving, his back rising and falling drastically as he struggled for breath.

"Van look at me!" Hitomi told him.

He gave her a sharp look, and his eyes burned red. A small yelp of fear escaped her, which immediately made him retract some of his rage. He had never instilled fear in her before, he had never seen her scared of him and there she was afraid to approach him from his own doing.

He hated the fact that he wasn't allowed to feel what he was feeling freely but he cared more about her, so regardless he wanted to make her feel better.

He straightened up and sheathed his sword and allowed her to walk over to him in her own time.

"H-How did it go?" she asked timidly.

"Not well," he said.

"Is there anything I can do?" she asked optimistically.

He gave her a look that shot her hopes down and he began to walk away from her.

"Van wait!" she called running after him,"Van let me help you?"

"How?" he asked vehemently.

He was looking down, trying to hide his anger from her until she forced him to look at her. Gently she forced his chin up slightly so that he was looking down at her rather than the ground. She was smiling a little.

"Why are you smiling?" he asked.

A corner of her mouth tugged up a little more, "because three years ago you were the same height as me."

He was taken a little off guard by the sentiment, "what?"

"I didn't have to look up to see your face," she clarified.

"Oh..." he said, unsure of what to say, which caused him to look away.

She smiled again, "oh Van..."

She had her hands on either side of his face to keep him there and to help him stay grounded.

"Breathe," she told him, "don't think, just breathe."

That was something she realized right there. She'd wondered why she'd fallen for Van over Allen, since the reasons didn't seem altogether clear. She had developed stronger feelings for Van than Allen, there wasn't any question of that, it was why. On paper it seemed quite ludicrous for her to pick Van and she could never quite figure it out. But there, as she caressed the side of his face and watched the movement of his eyes under the lids she was able to.

For one thing, if this was Allen he wouldn't have allowed his emotions to get the better of him and he wouldn't have needed her to be there. He would have apologized for his behavior and never allowed her to see a side of him where he was less than magnanimous. He was indeed flawless; a perfect example of a gentleman. Completely respectable, reasonable and treated her like she was a lady.

Van on the other wasn't quite like that, it couldn't be said that he wasn't respectable but his personality set him apart from Allen very much. Van felt things still; his blood was hot and his passion resonated from him at all times. Van had a dark sexiness to him, he wasn't completely well mannered and forgetting his ancestry, he was more human than Allen was. He needed her and he treated her like that, he didn't put her in a position where she felt overlooked because of her gender. He saw her as his equal and needed her in his life just as she needed him in hers.

She could feel his body relaxing slowly and his face lean into her hands.

"Better?" she asked softly.

He gave her a small nod as he kept his eyes closed. Just then the idea occurred to her to kiss him. She'd never initiated a kiss before even though she had wanted to, he had always just sensed what she felt, however this time he wasn't in tune with her. He was concentrating on ridding his body of the anxiety it was full of, so he wasn't able to adapt to her. She knew she would get no where if she depended on him so it was up to her to get what she wanted.

Her hands were still on his face so she was at an advantage. So he wouldn't notice what was going on she stood on her toes and brought her face up to his. At the sudden contact of skin his body froze and his eyes flew open causing her to pull away from him.

"Sorry," Hitomi mumbled quickly, shrinking away slightly.

Immediately his hands gripped her upper arms as he ground his mouth against hers.

* * *

It had been two days since the men had gone to Basram and while they had retold the entire story to the women there wasn't much they could do about it. Everything that Basram was doing was independent, they didn't necessarily need to take out another empire by force. They would slowly whittle down the population surreptitiously and by the time the unsuspecting nation noticed, they would be too unpopulated to do anything about it. It was a simple plot that had disastrous affects but there wasn't a whole lot they could do, especially since the whole plan didn't appear to be too hidden.

Hitomi still hadn't said anything to Millerna and even though it appeared that she had forgotten about it, Hitomi was still a woman and knew that a grudge would begin to burrow itself in her.

It was early in the afternoon and Millerna had left the group to take a nap. Hitomi had taken advantage of the opportunity immediately and bounded after Millerna.

"Millerna!" Hitomi called as the queen made her way up the stairs to her room.

"Oh, Hitomi, is everything alright?" Millerna asked as she turned around.

"I wanted to apologize-" Hitomi started.

"Hitomi, that's really not necessary," Millerna said.

"It is though. I was out of line and I shouldn't have condescended to you like that," Hitomi said.

Millerna just looked at her not sure how to respond, she'd never received an apology before so it was relatively awkward, "Hitomi it's alright...really."

"I know you're just being polite... but I need you to know that I know what I said was wrong. I can't even begin to understand where you're coming from so...I'm sorry," Hitomi said.

"Thank you...I appreciate it," Millerna said softly, "would it be alright if I left now though?"

Hitomi smiled and nodded.

As she headed back she had almost no desire to stand in the room with Allen's crew, Dryden and Van as they talked about this foreboding doom that hovered above them. For once the idea of sleeping didn't seem like such a bad idea, all the worrying, sadness and stress just seemed like they would be easily remedied by sleep. The more she thought about it the sleepier she got, and by the time she got to her room the sight of her bed made her almost as happy as Van did.

Even though she didn't fall asleep she was able to rethink everything that had happened in the past few weeks; particularly the past few days. She'd experienced a lot of emotional throws in the small amount of time; it was exhausting, she was physically sore from it all.

It still wasn't her ideal romance though, the secrecy seemed unnecessary but at the same time she couldn't picture herself being blatantly lovey-dovey with Van, at least in public. He was a different person altogether, he kept his life private and unfortunately that meant that the part that involved her intimately would go with that. She understood it but still wished that if push came to shove he would throw all that dignity aside for her sake, which she knew he would do but sometimes she wished that there didn't always have to be an extreme case.

Even still, he had made love to her three times without being married and that had to account for something. He was still a man afterall, there were some things that didn't make a difference. Even Allen had succumbed to his genetic structure, if that happened in his case it was almost expected to happen with Van. However, Van's idea of patriarchy was held much higher than Allen's was, even with their reconciliation. For that reason alone he was bound to secrecy, no one would be tolerant to the fact that he had been ...deflowered before marriage.

There was something to be said for that, which Hitomi liked but could see both sides of the argument. Regardless of rules he had listened to his body and heart rather than his mind and rationale. He had thrown the code away and done what he wanted, and for some reason Hitomi trusted that he was able to reason what needed to be obeyed and what left room for discretion. Especially their third time, in his anger he had made it clear that all he wanted was some way to release it and needed her at the same time.

Hitomi blushed at the memory. She'd had the odd fantasy of having sex in an impromptu location but never had she pictured it on the Asturian palace roof. A large smile crept to her face the more she thought about every detail of his body and what he felt like but once she caught herself she did an instinctual look around the room to see if anyone had noticed. She suddenly felt her body temperature rise and rather than throwing the covers off she proceeded to hide under them, she'd never been so interested in sex before. However, she was fully aware that her interest had increased ten fold due to the fact that she had finally had an orgasm that night.

She covered her face with her hands, embarrassed by her sexually devious thoughts.

"What would my mother think..." she groaned, pulling the covers over her head.

* * *

"Hitomi?" Van called softly into her room.

There was no answer.

"Hitomi," he repeated a little louder.

Still there was no answer.

Partly out of curiosity and partly out of fear something might have happened to her. Upon opening her door he could see that she was sleeping soundly, tucked rather tightly under the covers.

"Hitomi?" he questioned, starting to laugh.

She still did not respond so he approached her sleeping form and gently placed his hand on her shoulder. Almost as soon as he touched her she jolted to conscious.

"What!" she gasped.

A smile had made its way to his face as he watched her adjust to being awake.

"What time is it?" she asked.

"You've been sleeping for a long time," he said.

"Did I miss anything?" she asked, yanking the covers out of places she didn't know they were.

He shook his head.

"I wanted to ask you something," he said sitting next to her.

"Oh...okay Van," she said rubbing her eyes.

"We're at a stand-still right now... and we could use your help," he said.

Hitomi gave him a skeptical look, "I can't do a reading Van...you know that."

He shook his head, "I know, I wanted to see if you could point out a good place to start."

"...how?"

"You did it to find me...when I was captured by Zaibach the first time," he said.

Hitomi thought about it, it wasn't fortune telling it was sensing something. Was there harm in doing that? It had proven helpful before, and as long as the right energy was motivating her, there was little threat.

"I guess I could do that," Hitomi agreed.

"Thank you. Hitomi, we can't let them get away with this," Van said.

She nodded, "I know."

* * *

**HAH betcha thought he'd propose! Nah I'm not into that shit... sorry about it but I can't do that. It wouldn't work. **

**So my literary loves, please find it in your hearts to review. I know this was a short one but I wanted to get something up before I start working and I hope you like it. Show your appreciation in a review! Yes... I am pushing for them... it's irritating but it also sucks to not know if it's satisfactory or not. **

**So, thank you for reading!  
**


	8. Get Ready

**So hey there buddies. I've noticed people with fewer chapters than me have more reviews...so as you might have guessed...I'm mildly insulted. Not really though, but sort of. **

**Anyway, so I am updating again because I'm good like that. I also want to bring something to your attention! So I've been watching this Escaflowne parody series on Youtube and it's actually quite legit. It's super funny and I think if you like Escaflowne you'll appreciate this. It's a 24 part series right now, I have posted the link for the first episode on my fanfiction profile. If you don't want to go there, you can type in **

**'Escaflowne VEAS 01' into the Youtube search bar and you want the one by 'hbi2k'**

**Do watch it, they deserve to be recognized!

* * *

**

As much as she wanted to, and no matter how hard she tried she wasn't able to concentrate at all. Allen had laid down a map for her just like the last time. She could feel his eyes burning holes into the top of her head as she stared down at the ratty parchment paper. The lines faded in and out as she tried in vain to concentrate on what she was doing. The now unfamiliar pendant's chain pressed into her skin as she gripped it tightly as if milking it of its power. However the deficiency of it had nothing to do with the pendant, it was all her; it was as if her mind had temporarily stopped working and all she could feel was pain.

"Hitomi?" Van asked putting his hand on her shoulder.

"I can't do it Van," she said looking at him, then at Allen.

Van transferred his look of concern to Allen who nodded at him.

Hitomi put her hand on Van's forearm to get his attention, "no it's not what you think. I'm physically not able to, I feel sick...I'm too weak to do it."

Van's brows furrowed, "can you walk?"

Hitomi nodded, "yeah I just don't have enough energy to do this right now. I'm so sorry."

"Hitomi, we should take you to bed," Allen said, already taking her into his arms to carry her.

"Allen what are you doing?" Hitomi protested, "Allen! Put me down, you're hurting me. I can still walk."

Allen looked mildly embarrassed and put Hitomi back down.

"Nice one there boss," Rieden joked, which was silenced quickly when Gaddes elbowed him in the ribs, "what? Wha'd I say?"

Hitomi easily walked past Allen to the doorway where Van stood.

"What are you going to do?" he asked.

Hitomi shook her head, "I don't think it's anything serious, I'll probably be fine tomorrow morning."

"Do you want me to have a look?" Millerna asked.

Van looked at Hitomi, allowing her to make her own decision.

She shook her head, "no, really it's fine. You guys are really blowing this out of proportion."

Van walked with Hitomi to her room to make sure she got there safely.

"I'm sorry about that," Hitomi repeated as they walked away from the others, alone.

"Don't apologize Hitomi, it's alright," he assured her.

"We can try again," she said, hoping to raise his spirits.

"We won't do anything right now," he said.

"Van it's nothing to worry about," Hitomi said, confused at their level of concern.

"I'm trusting your judgment Hitomi," he said, "but if it hasn't changed by tomorrow, I want you to let Millerna examine you."

Hitomi scoffed, "alright."

As they arrived at her door Hitomi felt a small sinking feeling in her stomach, she hated how whatever time she had with him was under a time constraint. They couldn't be together without worrying, simply because of protocol.

"I'll see you in the morning..." she trailed off.

"Good night Hitomi," Van said, turning to leave.

"Van?" Hitomi stopped him.

He looked at her.

"You don't have to leave so quickly..." she said coming towards him.

She watched as a few thoughts played across his face.

"Hitomi...I," he started.

"No one's around Van..." she protested, "don't you want to?"

She had cornered him, so to speak. No matter what answer he gave her it wouldn't be okay. He would hurt her feelings one way or another.

"Hitomi, you can't do that," he said.

"Do what?" she asked, but at this point she was starting to play with him and quite frankly enjoyed watching him squirm a little.

He looked at her like he knew exactly what she was thinking, which to a degree he did.

"You might want the pendant back," Hitomi offered.

The pendant hung loosely around her neck, she had put it on out of habit and forgotten to give it back.

"Well?" she said, wanting him to take it off her.

Knowing full well that she just wanted to have him touch her, he complied and reached around her neck to undo the clasp. This required him to step closer to her. Hitomi smiled at him as he fumbled with the small lock.

"I just want you near me," she said softly.

Van didn't say anything as he took the chain from around her neck and put it onto his own.

"Here, let me help you," Hitomi offered as she brought her arms around his neck to do the clasp up.

Van brought his arms down and placed his hands on her hips. She let out a small breath she didn't know she was holding and gently brought her hands down to his chest.

"I didn't wait three years so that I could only spend time with you in secret," she said.

"Hitomi, we can't-" he started.

"I know," she laughed bitterly, "I know you're a King and that this isn't proper decorum but... I want you to look at me like you do when we... when we're alone...when we aren't, if that made sense."

He didn't say anything.

"I know it's not possible for us to be a couple right now, but we are... can you say something? Cause right now I'm doing a lot of talking and I'm not totally sure if it's getting through," she said.

A small smile made its way to his face and he closed the distance between them with a soft kiss.

"You can't do that every time I say something that you don't have an answer to," Hitomi said, pressing her lips together.

He kissed her again.

She smiled into his mouth and took his bottom lip in between her teeth gently, "what did I just say?"

Suddenly her arousal increased dramatically as his hands tightened around her waist. The sensation of his body against hers registering more quickly and intensely, her body had become hypersensitive to his touch. She hadn't gone into it wanting anything more than a goodnight kiss but her hormones began to bargain against her.

Luckily her mind won over, albeit at that point she was practically glued to him.

"H'Ohh my god..." she gasped as she pulled her mouth away from him.

"What?" he asked.

Hitomi pressed the back of her fingers to her slightly swollen lips.

"Um... I think I should probably go to bed now. I need some sleep," she said.

With that she quickly opened her bedroom door and walked in without another word, leaving Van alone with his thoughts and some slightly tighter pants.

She leaned against the door, reliving the euphoria she'd just had one more time before clearing it from her mind. It was the first time she had actually kissed him and that was all. Even though it had almost escalated into more she had stopped it. She bit her lip as she tried to remove the grin from her face. She loved how much he wanted her, even though he tried not to and she loved the fact that she was finally able to kiss him. It was only at that moment that she had realized everything she had wanted was coming to fruition; she'd finally tasted his lips and felt him inside her. She hadn't hit nineteen yet and she knew he was the only one she would ever want to wake up next to.

With the same stupid smile on her face she had to stop herself from galloping over to the bed.

That night she slept without any trouble at all.

* * *

The next morning what she expected had happened. She was completely fine, aside from the odd muscle pain and ridiculous hunger.

Once dressed she hurried down to the dining room, excited to sit down and eat for the first time she'd been in Gaea.

Millerna was already seated at the table eating, while Dryden was reading over something as usual.

"Good morning Hitomi, are you feeling better?" Allen greeted as she took a seat across from Millerna.

Hitomi was a little startled at his abruptness, so it took her a second to process her answer, "yes, I'm fine Allen."

That was when Hitomi did a quick look around the room and noticed Van was missing.

"Where's Van Merle?" Hitomi asked as Merle entered the room.

Merle looked around and shrugged, "how should I know?"

Hitomi looked at her quizzically, "don't you know everything about him...?"

Merle put her hands on her hips, "I'm not a stalker Hitomi!"

Hitomi put her hands up in defense, "sorry about it!"

"You should be!" Merle said sitting down next to Millerna.

"So what's the plan for today?" Dryden asked putting down his book.

All of them looked toward him.

"Oh... I didn't realize that was my job," Dryden said scratching the back of his head.

"We can't keep letting days go by," Van said as he walked in.

"Lord Van!" Merle squealed and ran to his side.

"Van," Hitomi smiled.

"And just where were you!" Merle demanded.

Van looked at her surprised, "I uh...sleeping?"

"Oh," Merle said awkwardly, then gestured to the empty seat beside her, "come sit Lord Van!"

"How are you feeling Hitomi?" Van asked, taking a seat next to her rather than Merle.

A subtle, triumphant smirk appeared on Hitomi's lips before she turned to answer him.

"I'm fine, really," Hitomi said kindly.

"Would you be willing to try again then?" he asked.

Hitomi took a second before nodding.

After they'd finished eating, Allen brought out the same map for Hitomi to dowse.

Van handed her the pendant and watched as she strung it through her fingers before closing her eyes and hovering it over the map. Her hand hovered over the paper moving slowly as she continued to concentrate on searching.

"There!" Hitomi exclaimed after a long time of silence. Her hand stopped as soon as her eyes opened and they all looked down to see where the pendant had stopped.

"Ubdo..." Allen read leaning over Hitomi.

Van looked at Allen with wide eyes then at Hitomi.

"Going to Ubdo is impossible," Allen said matter-of-factly.

Van frowned and looked back at Allen, prompting him to clarify, however Dryden stepped in instead.

"As much as I hate to agree with Allen, the only way to Ubdo is through Rah Drick, an area completely devoid of life," Dryden said, earning himself a dirty look from Allen.

"Rah Drick is the cursed zone. No one who has entered has ever returned," Allen said.

Hitomi looked down, disappointed in herself for giving Van false hope. The tension was thick in the room and none of them knew how it got so uncomfortable in such a short span of time. Everyone was holding back something.

"I'm sorry, " Hitomi apologized, "I can try again?"

Allen touched her shoulder in efforts to comfort her.

"I guess we'll have to pack good luck charms then," Van stated coldly.

"What?" Hitomi exclaimed, "weren't you listening? Going to Ubdo is suicide!"

By now, Van was walking away from her, his mind already made up.

Hitomi got up from her chair to go after him but he stopped her when he spoke again, "if we do nothing, Basram will finish us off. Given those choices, I'll take suicide."

"There's still time Van. Let's go to Freid and gather more forces," Allen offered.

Van turned on his heel, stopping Allen from continuing, "why would they help? Like it or not, we're going to have to do this on our own."

"Van-" Hitomi started.

"If we're going to stop them, we have to take risks," Van interrupted, "cowardice is for the weak..and dead."

He was shaking, his anger had become physical and it was resonating from him.

"Van...are you okay?" Hitomi asked.

With that Van left the room, Merle hot on his heels.

Hitomi stood watching after him for what seemed like forever, _I can feel him hurting again_. Suddenly her thoughts were interrupted when she felt Allen's hand on her shoulder. When she looked up at him he gave her a comforting smile but all she wanted to do was slap him. Even though she was more inclined to agree with Allen's safety approach, she hated that he always went that route, as if in spite of Van. She didn't want to feel anger toward Allen but that seemed to be all that she could summon. Trying to make it not obvious on her face, she easily walked away from him to stand on the terrace.

The morning was cool and beautiful. The city was bathed in pure white morning light and the sound of people beginning their day began to resonate from the city below. The sound was so different to home, there were no cars or electric sounds erupting from every direction, there wasn't a muddle of smells and colors, it was all simple and effective. The sea air floated through the streets and white washed buildings made the city look neat and well kept.

Hitomi took a deep breath and allowed the feeling to take over and relax her, but just as she felt her body adhering to her mind she felt another presence behind her.

"Hi Hitomi," Allen greeted kindly.

"Allen-hey," she said turning to him.

"Have you been thinking about the trip to Ubdo?" he asked.

Hitomi looked surprised, then looked down, "well...a little. I'm scared, I'm really scared. I have no idea how Van can be so brave..." She turned around again to face the sea, "but he's right... I think we have to take risks."

They were both silent for a while before Allen spoke, "then we'll go to Ubdo."

Hitomi turned to face him quickly, "what?"

'And I swear I'll do my utmost as a Knight to protect you from harm."

Hitomi stared at him with wide eyes, then began blushing, "Allen I-"

"Is that alright?" he asked.

They had subconsciously gotten closer during the conversation until they were standing directly in front of each other. Allen put his arms around her and pulled her in closer.

"A-Allen, " Hitomi stuttered," I appreciate the gesture-"

Just then Hitomi heard Van's voice gradually getting louder and didn't quite know how to get out of her predicament. Just then he appeared only a few feet away from where they stood. Hitomi watched as his eye widened and a look of embarrassment took hold of his features and he took a step back.

"Van!" Hitomi blurted out immediately.

He didn't let her finish, not because he was upset, which he was but that wasn't why he left. He knew his previous anger would have spilled over into that and he would have said something to her that he would ultimately regret, so leaving was his best option.

* * *

"We're off," Dryden said to one of the advisers.

"Yes Lord Dryden," he said, "but are you sure-"

"We'll be fine. Please take care of things while I'm gone," he said.

"Are you sure you want to come Dryden?" Van asked, "with Millerna?"

"What's that supposed to mean!" Millerna snapped.

Hitomi almost burst out laughing but stopped herself quickly.

"Uh... well it's easier if Escaflowne and Scherezade are the only units going, if the Crusade goes it will be even harder to get there," Van explained uncomfortably.

"It is easier with the melefs alone, the Crusade will be a much easier target to attack," Allen added.

"You're sure that's why you're protesting?" Millerna said flatly.

_Did she take wit pills this morning?_ Hitomi thought, stifling another laugh.

"Are you kidding?" Dryden asked, "we made it to the Mystic Valley on my ship, I can do Rah Drick. Also, I'm not missing a chance to see Ubdo."

"Alright, if you're sure, let's do this," Van said.

"I'll take the lead, and you take the rear. All right?" Allen asked.

Van shrugged, "whatever, let's just go."

Hitomi looked at Van walk ahead of her in his own sulky way, and ran after him.

"What's with you?" she asked.

"Hey Hitomi, don't do anything stupid okay?" he ordered harshly.

Hitomi was taken aback at his sudden harshness toward her, "what? I don't-"

"If you get hurt, I'm out a compass. You get me?" he said harshly and continued walking again, "_damn!_"

Hitomi felt her blood start to boil, "well thanks for your concern! Now would you drop the attitude!"

Van said nothing as he made his way to Escaflowne and opened the cockpit. Hitomi waited as the form changed into the white dragon so she could get on.

Even though she knew he had a right to be somewhat angry, she couldn't find justification in his actions and especially found it hard to consider forgiving him for what he said. He was lucky she hadn't slapped him, considering she was kicking herself for not hitting him.

The whole ride had been silent. Van had listened carefully to the orders he was given and made sure to follow Allen and Dryden. She knew he felt patronized but there was no sense in arguing seeing as he really didn't know what he was doing.

They'd been flying a good while by the time Hitomi started to feel her body giving up on her a little. Her strength was diminishing and she could feel nauseousness coming on from the turbulent flying.

"Van," she said, attempting to be loud.

"What?" he answered coldly.

Hitomi didn't respond and her grip around his torso slackened.

"Hitomi?" he asked, his tone beginning to change as he turned to look down at her.

"Rah Drick is up ahead!" Allen informed him.

"What!" Van shouted as he snapped his head forward.

Large, jagged pillars of rock and crystal shot up from the ground, forming a labyrinth of deadly obstacles.

"Stay alert! Reduce your flying speed. Space-time storms are commonplace here," Allen said.

"So a detour dodging pillars is safer!" Van yelled.

Van's stress level was rising, the fact that he needed to stay alert and Hitomi was pulling this was not what he needed.

"Come on Hitomi!" he ordered, trying to hoist her up in front of him.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled as she did her best to help him, unfortunately the sick feeling was overwhelming her and she fell against him.

"Why do they call this the cursed zone anyway?" Van grumbled as he tried to fix his arm so that she was more supported by it.

As he looked down he spotted between some lower pillars of rock and debris, the ruins of several air crafts. He hadn't been expecting his answer so abruptly.

"That's an Asturian levi-ship!" Van exclaimed as he began to near the wreckage.

"Van!" Allen called, "something's wrong! Be on your guard!"

Allen's interruption pulled Van back from his curiosity and to reality in just enough time to stop him from becoming a part of it.

"Hitomi?" Van asked trying to jerk her alert, but she stayed relatively unconscious, barely clinging to him for her life, "damn it Hitomi! Snap out if it!"

Struggling to support her as well as guide Escaflowne, he yanked on the reigns to gain altitude. As they continued to fly the sense of hopelessness began to take hold of all of them. The terrain seemed endless and none of it resembled any sort of breaking point or end. It all became one vast plain of desolation.

"It's been three hours and we're still going!" Van yelled in frustration.

"It's certainly odd," Allen agreed with less enthusiasm, then his tone changed, 'what!"

Van looked down just as the thought escaped Allen's lips, there were the same destroyed leviships.

"Great! We went in a great big circle! Now what?" Van complained as he tried to hide the panic from his tone.

However he had no time to think as a jagged pillar began hurtling toward him, 'what the-!"

"Van!" Allen called out as he intercepted, instinctively smashing the moving rock before it came in contact with them.

"The _rocks_ attacked us!" Van exclaimed.

"So that's it," Allen breathed calmly.

Van snapped his head toward Allen, completely confused as to what he was talking about.

Luckily Allen picked up on Van's vibrations and continued to explain his thought process, "the cursed zone is certainly an appropriate title."

"They're just rocks!" Van tried to argue, "are you saying we can't take _rocks_!"

Almost as if they had heard him, another pillar came crashing toward him.

"What _is_ this!" Van yelled as he barely dodged his death.

Suddenly Hitomi lurched from his arms and pointed behind Allen, "Allen! Watch out behind you!"

"What-" Allen started as he turned to look at what she was pointing at. A series of jagged rocks were making their way toward him at incredibly fast speeds.

"Shit! The rocks are closing up!" Van panicked as he tried to look for an escape but everywhere seemed to be closing up. Frantically he tried in vain to break the enclosing rocks, "smashing them doesn't work!"

"Van! North by north west!" Hitomi yelled pointing to the exit.

"Got it!" Van yelled back and yanked the reigns up, and pulled out the sword to blast through the rocks.

A much larger explosion erupted from the simple action of colliding the sword with the rock than they had expected. Once the aftershock and haze cleared they were able to see that the shattered rocks created a passage for them all to move through.

"You were right...good work Hitomi..." Van breathed a little stunned.

Hitomi looked unimpressed, "you've known me how long and you're still surprised?"

Van pretended to not hear her.

Instead he made it look like he was completely engrossed in the sight before him, which to a degree, he was but he had still heard what she said.

There, amongst all that toxic rock was an alcove of pure crystal. A pristine lake of the clearest water was cradled within the jagged stone and a sculpture of pink stone stood in the very center. The light from the sky glittered on the water and shone translucently through the pink rock, creating a double reflection where all the light was cast back and forth throughout the cave.

Van was the first to start moving as he jumped out of the cockpit and began walking toward the spring. Hitomi quickly followed his lead and proceeded to get out of Escaflowne. Once Allen and Dryden were by their sides they began to approach the compelling, effulgent display.

"That must be it...the Holy Spring Ubdo," Dryden said.

* * *

**TALK ABOUT LONG-ASS-MO-FOing CHAPTER EH!**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! damn it. please.**

**And watch the youtube video! (on my profile)  
**


	9. Is This How Love's Supposed to Feel?

**Hello there. I hope you have watched the video on youtube. If not the link is still on my profile! **

**Anyway, so I'm not sure how this will go. I've experienced a reoccurance of some unrequited love. I've been trying to change my energy a bit but for some reason I feel like I need to be sad... if that makes sense. I can't just ignore it because everytime I think about him, there come the unsettling feelings. **

**Alas, I remain human. **

**

* * *

**

The place maintained an eerie silence that echoed through the crystalline walls. Every sound they made was amplified; the lightness of their breath seemed to reverberate off the walls and water.

"I can't believe we actually made it," Dryden breathed.

"What do you mean _I can't believe it_, nice to see we had Dryden's faith on our side," Merle stated loudly.

"Shh..." Van trailed off not really paying attention to anyone.

He began walking forward like he was possessed by something other than his own soul. Hitomi exchanged a look of concern with Allen before they slowly began to follow him.

Van had stopped when he was ankle deep in the water. His gaze hadn't shifted from the sculpture since he'd seen it; the strange beauty of it had captured him completely. No one seemed to be able to distract him.

"What's going on?" Hitomi asked Allen, "what's wrong with him?"

Allen struggled to give her an answer seeing as he was in a foreign element as well, so she turned to Dryden.

"Pretty amazing isn't it?" Dryden said.

"What's happening?" Hitomi repeated.

Dryden looked at her, "nothing. He's just taking the time to absorb the surreality of it."

Hitomi suddenly felt stupid, she'd assumed something was wrong with him. Meanwhile it had been her, she hadn't been able to realize the wonderment of the situation she was in.

"Oh..." Hitomi said quietly looking back at Van.

"Congratulations," came an unfamiliar voice, "you made it through Rah Drick."

All of their attention suddenly snapped toward the man who began speaking to them. It was as if he appeared from out of nowhere. He stood at least a full foot shorter than everyone else. His age was evident as the hair on his head fell in long white tresses and his long facial hair matched. Hitomi watched the grace in his slow, languid movements as he floated over to them.

"My name is Lagusu, welcome Van Fanel," he said calmly as he addressed a stunned Van.

"How do you-" Van started.

"You didn't expect to come to a holy place so heavily guarded and have us not know who it is that has made it here," Lagusu said.

Van looked at Allen then back at Lagusu, "uh..."

"I am a human energist," he started.

"A _what_!" Van interrupted.

"I have power that surpasses all on Gaea," he explained.

"Are you in alliance with Basram!" Van basically accused as he reduced to a heavier stance, quickly grabbing the hilt of his sword.

"That won't be necessary," Lagusu chided calmly.

Van's expression darkened.

"Van! Don't go making brash accusations!" Allen scolded.

"If you have all this _unsurpassable_ power, why haven't you done anything with it?" Van asked darkly, "I assume you know what's been happening in Gaea."

"And you've come to Ubdo for help," Lagusu said, "alas, what you seek, we cannot provide."

Van frowned.

"Ubdo is a neutral nation, it will never become partial to another nation, however we are able to grant you with safety and protection. Ubdo is a place of rebirth and revitalization. Not one of destruction, to come to Ubdo is to cleanse oneself; to free one from turmoil and suppression," Lagusu said, "once one bathes in the Ubdo springs, rejuvenation and clarity come."

"That's it?" Millerna said.

"Ugh... it's like a hyped up day spa," Merle mumbled flatly.

"Or a battery recharge," Dryden said.

"This doesn't make sense, all this protection for a ...bath?" Allen said.

"Seems a bit over the top," Dryden said rubbing his chin.

It did seem a bit extreme for such a simple activity such as bathing.

"It will all make sense," Lagusu said before he retreated back to the shadows from which he came.

"What a fucking waste," Van murmured before he started walking away.

"Van..." Hitomi called but was expectantly ignored.

"Let him go," Allen said taking a hold of Hitomi's shoulders, "whatever's going on, he needs to come to terms with it before he can come to anyone else. The last thing we want is him going off on you."

Hitomi looked toward Van's retreating figure, "I just want him to talk to me."

* * *

It had been clear they were left to their own devices. Lagusu had not graced them with his appearance again so they had free will to leave or stay. Since they didn't want to make the whole journey a waste, like Van had expressed, they stayed and observed Ubdo. Most importantly, they took advantage of its most obvious feature, they bathed.

Of course, Van didn't stay in the company of the rest. He hadn't come back since his departure, which had caused some worry between the rest of them. It hadn't risen to the full fear, since it hadn't been that long, but the fact that they were in a place unfamiliar to them all did rise some kind of concern as to why he wasn't back yet.

Hitomi had been the first to volunteer to look for him, not only for the rest of them but because she was deeply unsettled about Van's coldness toward her.

Her finding him had been pure accident, the truth of the matter was that she, herself, had gotten lost. The labyrinth of crystal tunnels had become impossible to track, it wasn't long before she found herself walking in circles. Every thing started looking the same, causing an intense panic to overwhelm her.

"Hitomi?" the familiar voice stopped all the anguish instantly.

"Van!" Hitomi beamed at him.

He looked a little startled at her out of character joviality.

"Uh..." he stammered backing up a little.

"I'm so glad to see you!" she said throwing her arms around him.

They'd suddenly plunged back into their fifteen-year-old selves, or at least Van had. She had her arms around him and he remained completely unresponsive. His arms were pinned to his sides and refused to enclose around her. Feeling his discomfort she pulled away and stared at him.

"What's wrong Van?" she asked as he looked away from her, feeling a blush come to his cheeks.

He didn't say anything.

"_Van!_Answer me!" she said.

"What were you doing with Allen?" he snapped as he looked straight at her.

Hitomi looked at him with wide eyes, she knew it was coming but for some reason she hadn't been expecting it, "I thought that's what this was about."

Van just glared at her, he didn't need to be patronized, he wanted an answer. Everything he was feeling was justified and he was tired of being faulted for his emotions.

"Nothing," she answered picking up on his energy, "I swear, it meant nothing."

Van didn't look convinced.

Hitomi frowned, "what do you want from me Van? Why would you even think that I was capable of doing something like that to you?"

Van snorted, "Hitomi... this is _you_ we're talking about."

Hitomi's eyes widened in rage, "_what the hell do you mean by that Van Fanel?"_

Van didn't back down, "I seem to remember you being in _love_ with Allen once, and then you left him for me. What's to stop that from happening in reverse?"

Hitomi couldn't stop herself from slapping him, hard. She watched his face jerk to the side from the force of her hand, which didn't satisfy her quite enough. With just as much force she slapped him again with the back of her hand, jolting his jaw the other way.

Tears began collecting in her eyes as she watched him slowly recover, she hated the silence he gave her.

"Say something," she ordered, her voice shaking with the oncoming tears, "say _something_ damn it."

He didn't, he just stared her down with the same intensity she gave him.

"How could you even _think_ that! What part of me coming back for _you_ don't you understand!" Hitomi yelled.

"Hitomi, you've been known to change your mind," he said coldly.

Hitomi found herself incapable of believing what he was saying, "Van I'm not interested in Allen!"

"Prove it," he challenged.

Hitomi bit her lip and went to slap him again, but this time he caught her wrist and wouldn't let go.

"I don't have to prove _anything_ to you Van," Hitomi refuted.

He let out a short, unkind laugh, and kissed her roughly. His hand wove around her to the to the back of her head and pulled her in against him tightly. There didn't seem to be a point in struggling, he was relentless as well as very strong. As much as she wanted to resist, she was so thankful to feel him on her again that she was afraid that her protest might read wrong. However, she wasn't able to stop being angry at him. After indulging herself slightly and relishing the taste of his mouth she sank her teeth into his bottom lip. Not enough to pierce the skin but enough to make him stop.

He let out a barely audible yelp and pulled away from her. Hitomi stood there watching him turn away from her slightly as his eyes never left hers.

He brought his hand down from his mouth to reveal a smug grin, ' you wanted it."

Hitomi had to stop herself from hitting him again, "stop being so smug Van. I hope you got your answer."

He shrugged, "you did bite me."

"And you think that I was wrong?" Hitomi asked.

"I think that what I saw you and Allen doing looked like more than nothing," he said.

Hitomi sighed and looked down, then back at Van, "Van... you have to forgive me, you have to- I didn't even do anything! I'm trying to tell you that and you won't listen! It's like you _want_ something to be going on!"

Van looked genuinely surprised by her comment, "I..." he had no idea how to respond.

"I would never do that to you."

Van looked down, clearly embarrassed. His actions had been completely uncalled for and he was now realizing that he was wrong.

Hitomi knew what she had said resonated, his lack of anything to say was clear proof. He was never one to carry on when he was wrong and he knew it. She knew as well as he did, that her leaving him was the last thing he wanted.

* * *

**Holy crap it took me a long time to get this out... **


	10. Look What You've Done

**HEYO... uhh so here I guess.**

**

* * *

**

The journey home had been moderately awkward, just because it was clear that Van and Hitomi had at least talked. Also Van's face was abnormally red.

Things weren't smoothed over. Hitomi hadn't quite gotten over Van's behavior and didn't quite know where they stood. Obviously, things would be fine but right now she felt uncomfortable with just letting things go. They'd remained silent the whole way back, she could have opted to ride in the Crusade but chose to stay with Van on Escaflowne, but they'd been silent the whole time.

Once they arrived back in Pallas they didn't waste any time being uncomfortable. They easily dismissed each other and went to their separate rooms, and remained there for the rest of the night.

* * *

Allen, Van and Dryden had been brainstorming in Dryden's study for a long time. They'd wasted no daylight in trying to come up with some kind of plan that would set them in motion against Basram.

"We can't just attack them," Allen said as he stared at the floor.

Dryden was sitting on his desk skimming through books he thought might have some relevance to their situation. Both of them maintained a strong concentration on the task at hand, focusing all their energy on what they were going to do. Where as Van wasn't able to keep still, his usual calm facade was no where to be seen, it was almost strange; he had always kept his decorum when it came to things like planning an attack but the fact that they weren't able to make any progress had set him on edge.

"Van, would you sit down," Dryden suggested, looking up from one of his books.

Van looked at little startled at the sudden mention of his name, luckily he wasn't required to respond.

"We need a reason to go to Basram again..." Allen said.

Van exchanged a quick look with Dryden.

"How do we do that?" Van asked.

Allen was silent.

"To go into battle with Basram is a huge commitment, while Zaibach was hard, Basram is debatably their equivalent... if not more powerful, especially now," Dryden said, "they're creating their own 'power of Atlantis'... artificially. The idea is sound..."

Van and Allen looked at Dryden confused.

"In theory, I mean. Think about it, people have always wanted to fly, and it's basically the only thing holding us back from being perfect. I mean, we can think, create, walk, talk, swim, we have opposable thum... the next step in creating genetic superiority would be the capability of flight," Dryden explained.

Van and Allen said nothing as they thought about what Dryden was saying.

"That isn't to say their methods are the best, but their intention does have some justification," Dryden concluded.

"Van..." Allen said.

Van looked at Allen.

"Van, you know they'll come for you... maybe not right away but it's only a matter of time," he said.

Van nodded.

"So our job is to make sure we stop them before they get to that point," Van said.

Both Allen and Dryden nodded apprehensively.

"We need to see what they're doing without getting tracked," Van said.

"You mean like spying on them?" Dryden asked.

"More like... getting caught on purpose," Van answered.

"But they wouldn't capture us, they're only going after civilians," Allen said.

"Then it's a matter of disguising ourselves," Van said.

"Okay, fine, pretending your plan works. How do we get out? This has too many holes in it Van," Allen said.

Allen was right, and Van could acknowledge that, but he didn't want to.

"I didn't hear you offering up any suggestions," Van said, alternatively.

"It's not that simple... we need to think this out carefully," Allen said.

Van sat against the edge of the table and waited for them to speak.

"We need them to make the first move, we can't attack them right now because we don't know where they stand," Allen said.

"Now's the best time to attack! They're still developing!" Van said.

Dryden shook his head, "it would affect the civilians if we attacked now."

"Do whatever you want," Van gave in, "you know more than I do."

Van's frustration had come to a boil, he was at the point where he really didn't care what happened as long as some kind of action was taken.

He ended up leaving the two other men alone in Dryden's study to brainstorm a _sensible_ plan of action, which seemed to be a bit of an oxymoron to Van. War itself was barbaric and uncivilized, so how could there possibly be a sensible way to approach it.

* * *

He left the palace easily. Since he'd been rather humble in his existence there, he'd gone practically undetected when leaving.

His first thought was to go into the town but he decided against it. He'd never really been one for crowds, which made the idea of him being King even more unfitting but it remained his blood right, and his alone. Van wandered away from the palace grounds and wound up following a path that he didn't quite realize why it was familiar. It led to the same barn that held Escaflowne three years ago, when he was in Asturia.

That's where he'd always gone, he didn't even sleep in the palace when he had this place. He smiled a little at the odd calmness that started to take hold of him at the fact that he finally found some kind of refuge. He pushed hard on the two large wooden doors until they opened. The place was pretty much the same as when he had left it; there was clear evidence of aging and erosion in the wood but it was still comfortable. There were pieces of clothing and remnants of what looked like someone's attempt at a bed but other than that nothing had changed; it still maintained the same stale smell of rain and dust.

Van climbed the wooden ladder that stretched to the first loft, and opened the large shutters of the window. The day was cloudy and pretty dismal; everyone was just waiting for it to rain.

The Asturian countryside was different to Fanelia by a large stretch. For one, Fanelia was enclosed by land, it was no where near the sea, so the idea of having canals was unheard of. The air was different, no doubt an effect of the sea and the general climate was more wet than Fanelia's.

Taking a deep breath, he sat in the frame of the window and stared out at nothing. His mind was finally starting to loosen up and that was something he'd been longing for.

"Van?" someone called.

Van's heart sank as he heard Hitomi call him, he really didn't feel up to a conversation.

"Van?" she repeated.

For a brief moment he contemplated not saying anything and waiting for her to leave, but his better judgment won.

"Yeah?" he said half-heartedly, raking a hand through his hair and getting up. He walked to the edge of the loft so she could see him, "hey."

"Oh... hey," she said.

"Everything okay?" he asked curtly.

"Um... yeah, I think so," she said, fidgeting, "you wanna come down?"

"You wanna come up?" he said without thinking.

"Oh... sure," she said, making her way to the ladder.

Once she was up he resumed his spot on the windowsill.

"I remember this place..." she said.

Van made a noise in agreeance with her.

She was forcing small talk, why was she forcing herself to converse with him? Why was it this hard?

"Van... I'm not... happy here," she said.

This got his attention as he snapped his head toward her, "Asturia?"

Hitomi sighed, "no Van..."

"What is it?" he asked.

Hitomi looked down and began fidgeting again, "I just... don't-I don't know."

Van sat up and looked at her, "yes you do."

Hitomi raked a hand through her hair and looked away.

"Hitomi?"

"I'm... I just..." Hitomi stammered.

"Hitomi, come on," he said.

Hitomi closed her eyes tightly then re-opened them, this wasn't a conversation she wanted to have with him.

"I'm pregnant Van," she said.

"Uhh..." was about all he could say, while his eyes widened about as much as they possibly could.

"Can you say something else?" she asked quietly.

Van hadn't been able to change his expression, in fact his mind was on such an overload that his muscles had stopped receiving messages. This wasn't something he needed to hear, he could feel insanity starting to grip him. This wasn't okay, as a King he wasn't allowed to have this happen, but of course it would. He'd never been one to have much luck, so why would this be any different? He could not have a bastard son, that couldn't happen! His family name would be tarnished, he was the last living heir to the Fanel family and he'd already soiled the lineage! What would the other countries think? What would his people think? What would _Allen_ think? He couldn't have Hitomi pregnant with the newest Fanel addition, it wasn't going to work! She would ultimately be Queen but he couldn't have a child before a lawful spouse-

"Van!" Hitomi yelled, snapping him out of his myriad of thoughts.

"Huh?"

"Van! Tell me what you're thinking," she said walking closer to him, "I need to hear what you're thinking."

It was a few seconds before he said anything, "uh... how do you know?"

Hitomi looked down, "Millerna."

Van looked at her again, this time his eyes were wide in concern, "Millerna knows?"

Hitomi nodded.

"Anyone else?"

Hitomi shook her head, "I found out a little before I came here."

"...what are we going to do?" he mumbled.

Hitomi swallowed before answering, "I could go back..."

Van frowned and stared at her in confusion, "but..."

"We have this... procedure... on Earth, where we can... abort the pregnancy," Hitomi said carefully.

Van looked at her skeptically, he knew what she was saying and didn't like the fact that she had tried to deceive him, "you mean they can kill unborn children?"

"It's totally safe," Hitomi tried.

"Hitomi...no...I...no," Van said trying to grasp what she was suggesting.

Hitomi was quiet before she continued, "there's also the option of me staying on earth for the full term..."

Van tilted his head in thought, it wasn't a bad idea. It could at least buy them a little time, "but you just got here..."

"It's sort of our only option..." Hitomi said giving him a sad smile.

He nodded, "I know."

"No one needs to know," she tried.

He nodded.

"Hey..." she said softly to get his attention.

As he turned to her she kissed him softly.

"Everything is going to be alright Van," she said taking his face in her hands.

He suddenly grabbed her face and kissed her so hard she fell backward against the window frame.


	11. Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

**Yeah... so I confirmed some people's suspicions, but I'm pretty sure what I'm planning isn't what you're expecting. Give it a chance!

* * *

**

He woke up to a sensation of bright light and warmth. His skin was hot and wet, for the few seconds after he opened his eyes he was blinded by a pure yellow light, which disoriented him slightly until his eyes adjusted to the exposure.

Hitomi was sitting up and had her bare back toward him as she slipped on her shirt. As he sat up he could feel bits of straw clinging to his damp skin.

"The sun came out," he stated.

Hitomi turned around fully dressed, "oh, you're awake."

"Are you really having my baby Hitomi?"

Hitomi's expression softened as she walked over to him, "no one will know."

"But what about when it's born?" he asked.

She loved seeing him like this; his vulnerability was beautiful. When he let his guard down he could be so irresistible.

"We'll figure it out when we get there," she said.

He didn't say anything he just looked up at her with searching eyes, she could see the uneasiness he was feeling and for reasons that were so much more magnified than on Earth. He had no parents he could go to for help, in fact there was no one he could go to for help, he'd been dealing with issues so much bigger than the capacity he had to accept them from an early age. Things were just forced on him and he was expected to handle them perfectly without any kind of practice or preparation.

"I'm sorry Van," she said genuinely feeling she had done him wrong, knowing full well that they were both responsible. She was aware of birth control, he wasn't...had she taken advantage of him?

She watched him look down and the sun shift across his face. His skin absorbed the light like melted caramel and his hair only seemed to shine more. He'd gone from Prince, to Man of the House, to Orphan, to King in a matter of fifteen years, it took longer than that to get through school on Earth and now he had the addition of expectant father; he could never catch a break.

What a beautiful disaster.

* * *

They had told the rest of them that Hitomi would be going back to Earth as soon as possible. They were careful not to allude to the fact that she was pregnant and tried to be as solid about it as they could. The fact remained though, that it really was quite peculiar that Hitomi was leaving so suddenly after such a short time, but they chalked it down to her being homesick and it was the best thing she could do.

Even though Millerna knew the real reason she had stayed true to her word and kept her mouth shut.

"How long will you be gone?" Millerna asked as she watched Hitomi pace back and forth.

"Until I have the baby," Hitomi said, "I can't come back pregnant... that would look worse!"

"But what about when you have it? Then what?" Millerna asked.

"I don't know, I just thought I'd buy us a little time," Hitomi said.

"But you've got some time before anyone will notice," Millerna said.

Hitomi shook her head, "no, I can already feel myself giving us away with my symptoms."

"Like what?"

"I'm tired all the time, and I'm hungry... for _everything_, and all I want to do when I see him is get him inside-"

"Alright, thanks Hitomi," Millerna cut her off.

"Not even when I see him..._all the time_, I can't stop thinking about sex!" Hitomi exclaimed.

Millerna blushed at Hitomi's brazen attitude toward intimacy.

"I'm sorry, am I making you uncomfortable?'

"So when are you leaving?" Millerna diverted.

"Well...as soon as possible...now," Hitomi said.

Millerna nodded, "I suppose that's best."

Hitomi nodded, "I think this came as a bit of a blessing."

Millerna frowned, "what do you mean?"

"Well... I _have _been homesick and... well I'm not happy. I think I left without any closure... and I never realized that."

"Do you miss your family more than him?"

Hitomi looked down, "I can't make that call... it's...I love it in Fanelia, I love him-of that, I'm sure, I just... need to be home right now. I'll always come back to him though... I'm sure of that."


	12. Good Guys

**Hey

* * *

**

Hitomi had been gone a day and already the effects of her departure were evident. it was like she had died or something, by the way no one ever wanted to bring her up, especially around Van. No one bothered to ask how he was, they merely assumed the relationship was over and left it at that, fearing any kind of backlash they might receive.

The fact that she had said she would return made no difference, people just assumed she was gone, for good.

The only one who had any insight was Millerna, who was true to her word and said nothing. Van had almost forgotten that he did have someone he could go to; that there was someone who he was able to talk to about Hitomi leaving.

"You know Basram is requesting an audience with us tomorrow Van," Millerna said.

It was probably the first time they'd ever spent any real amount of time together alone. Being who Van was, the idea of being around a woman wasn't exactly easy for him. He'd managed to hold very few women in his life, so the fact that Millerna was one didn't help him. Of course they were friendly, but they had never really spoken to each other directly, there was always a third party; either Allen or Hitomi. However in this particular situation, Van was forced to get over his awkwardness.

"Yeah..." Van grumbled as he played with a knife.

They were in the stables tending to horses. Even though Millerna was strictly forbidden not to ride them, she found great comfort in being around them at least. It also gave her time away from everyone who advised her to stay in bed.

"What are you going to do?" she asked, "I'm sure they're coming to form an alliance of some sort."

"Yeah..."

Millerna was becoming mildly irked with his lack of substance in his responses, "if they're coming to Asturia, it means they know something about you. They want to get close to you."

"Yeah..."

Millerna turned around to face him, "would you stop? If you didn't want her to go you should have said something!"

Van looked up a little startled, "why are you yelling at me?"

Millerna looked at him incredulously and threw her hands up in defeat, "good question!"

"You think they know?" Van asked after a while.

Millerna looked at him, "I think they might."

"What has Dryden said?"

Millerna shook her head, "you ask him, I'm not acting as your go-between."

Van frowned, "she couldn't stay... if they found out she was pregnant, they would have done something to her... I don't think I could handle that."

Millerna stopped brushing the horse and looked at him. He was miserable and she could tell he wasn't going to be alright for a while.

"Van, you need to stop worrying about her, she's going to be fine; everything will be. She's back on the Mystic Moon, safe. So right now you need to focus on what's happening here, now," Millerna told him, "you moping about this doesn't help anyone, particularly yourself."

"So what do you suggest I do?" Van asked begrudgingly.

"Figure it out Van, this is for you to decide. What I might do, is start talking to Dryden and Allen to move forward in this situation," she told him.

"fine," Van grumbled as he turned to walk out of the stables.

"Van," Millerna called just as he was almost out the door.

Van turned to her subtly.

"Everything's going to be alright... you know that don't you?" she asked.

Van opened his mouth to say something but decided against it and continued to walk away from her.

* * *

Allen and Dryden were right where Van had suspected; working diligently on on kind of strategy.

As soon as he entered Dryden's dimly lit and cluttered study the two other men fell silent. Each equally unsure of how to respond to the young King's presence. Being men, they had no grudge or any kind of hatchet but they were apprehensive on how to approach him. Since neither were anywhere near his age they had a difficult time seeing eye to eye with him, also there was the fact that neither of them had any idea of who he was or what he had been through in his course both of them had children, or at least Dryden had one on the way and Allen had fathered one illegitimately much like himself but the situations were different.

"Hi," Van said sheepishly.

Allen and Dryden exchanged looks.

"Any ideas?" Van continued.

"Well, Basram is coming tomorrow... we need to figure out what they could potentially want," Allen said.

"Whether it's an alliance, a threat or to gain information about you... and if it's you they want, Fanelia's where they'll hit first," Dryden said scratching his chin.

"This is a good thing, they've played in our court-" Allen started.

"No pun intended," Dryden added.

Van didn't laugh, he just stood there thinking.

"Anything you want to share Fanelia?" Dryden prodded.

"I don't think...I should be there," Van said slowly, "at the meeting tomorrow."

Dryden and Allen looked at each other, as emotional as Van could get with them sometimes he was an excellent dignitary, if he didn't let it hit him close to home.

"What are you saying?" Allen asked.

"If it's about me, which it probably will be, they can't know I'm here," Van said.

Dryden raised his eyebrows briefly as he thought about what Van was proposing.

"When Zaibach came to Asturia to reinforce their alliance, after they'd attacked Fanelia, they had no idea that I was there so they proceeded without caution," Van said.

"Until you practically gave yourself away," Gaddes said coming into the room.

Van turned to look at him with a scowl on his face.

"Nice to see your back to your old self," Gaddes stated to Van.

"Van has a point," Allen said, "Basram, technically, still has an alliance with Asturia so why wouldn't they come to their biggest ally for reinforcement first?"

"What would you have us do?" Dryden asked, "report back? Seems a little primary."

"No not primary, just efficient," Van said.

"How is that efficient, there's always stuff missing when it's relayed," Gaddes asked.

"Did you want something?" Van asked.

Gaddes put his hands up in defense, "struck a nerve eh?"

"Gaddes, really?" Allen chided.

"Sorry Boss," Gaddes said taking that as his queue to leave.

"This is what we should do," Van began.

* * *

"Hello?" Hitomi called into her house.

She'd come back to Earth completely safe and all that she had to welcome her was a dark and empty house. It had been a bit anti climactic, especially considering how excited she was to come home to see her family. She'd only been gone a little over a month and already she was back, was she making a mistake?

A series of questions began piling up as she walked through the house. Had any time passed while she was gone? How was she going to explain why she was home so soon? Where was everyone?

As soon as she got to the kitchen she instinctively picked up the phone and dialed Yukari's number.

"Hello?" Yukari answered just as Hitomi was about to hang up.

"Yukari?" Hitomi smiled, remembering the sound of her best friend's voice, "it's so good to hear you."

"Hitomi! What-how-_are you back!_" Yukari exclaimed.

Hitomi held the phone a small distance from her ear, "yeah, I am."

"What! Why! This is amazing, are you at home? I'm coming over," Yukari announced as she promptly hung up the phone.

Yukari arrived a little after ten minutes had gone by, and as soon as Hitomi opened the door she instinctively grabbed her. The two shared a much needed hug before staring at each other to merely observe the other's changes or lack of them.

"You look good, Tome," Yukari finally said, giving her friend another quick hug.

Hitomi smiled, "so do you."

"So what are you doing back?" Yukari asked immediately as the two sat down in the living room.

Hitomi thought about whether to tell her the truth or not and ultimately chose to, "I'm pregnant."

Yukari's eyes were wide, similar to Van's but held less fear, "wow."

Hitomi waited as her friend collected herself from the initial shock.

"I mean..._wow_, you guys didn't waste any time eh!" Yukari exclaimed but then paused, "wait... so you need to come home because you're pregnant?"

"Well it's easier for me to be on Earth while I carry it out, plus it gives me a reason to visit right? Grandparents?" Hitomi said.

Yukari seemed to buy it, "alright... it's cool with me!"

"I'm going to the doctor tomorrow... did you want to come with me?"

"Well yeah! Of course I want to go with you, but shouldn't you be doing that with your mom?"

Hitomi shrugged, "I haven't decided whether or not I'll tell her before I go."

Yukari looked skeptical, "really?"

Hitomi looked down, "I'm a little scared of her reaction..."

Yukari laughed, "I don't know, your mom can be pretty chill sometimes. She might surprise you."


End file.
